Smiling Back III
by RogueAngel
Summary: Danny and Kate make it back home to Tennessee
1. Default Chapter

Chapter 1  
  
Kate stood in front of the building that she had once called home. It was a marble montrosity, with the requisite columns and scroll work. It looked cold and unfeeling and it was. It was nothing compared to the cabin where she had Grace had lived for 2 years. The best years of her life despite the poverty. And yet, here she was, about to return to her childhood house and all it's memories. It hadn't changed a bit, but she wasn't the same girl she had been when she left. She was stronger, more confident. She would be all that Danny had seen in her. She would be strong for Danny and Grace.  
  
Taking Grace's hand she walked up the marble stairs, ignoring the 3 Chinese men who escorted her. She hadn't spoken to them since they had refused to bring Danny with them. She had offered them payment from her trust fund that she would recieve when she turned 25, but they did not want to disappoint her father by bringing back her lover. So be it. She had no more use for them, so she did not speak with them.  
  
The tall front door opened just as she reached it.  
  
"Welcome home, Miss," a familiar voice welcomed her.  
  
Kate tried to smile. "Hello James. How are you? And Matilda?" she asked politely. James had been the family butler for as long as she could remember and Matilda, his wife, was the cook.  
  
James smiled and bowed to her. "We're fine, Miss, thank you for asking. And may I say it's good to see you again."  
  
"Thank you James." Nodding towards Grace, she introduced her daughter to James.  
  
"Hello, Miss Grace," he said kindly to the shy toddler. "She's the spitting image of you at the same age, if I may say so," he told Kate smilingly. "Matilda will be tickled to see her."  
  
Kate nodded, trying to muster up a smile in return. "Is my father here?"  
  
"No, Miss," James frowned. "He had some business to attend to downtown. He should be back by dinner."  
  
"My mother?"  
  
He shook his head. "I believe she is at a meeting with the Red Cross."  
  
"Then I suppose Julianna isn't home, either," Kate guessed. James shook his head again. Kate had been gone for over 5 years. Everyone knew when she was going to arrive, yet no one could take time out of their busy lives to welcome her home. Typical. It was just as well, she didn't particularly want to see them. "Is my room ready?"  
  
"Yes, Miss," he said eagarly. "Everything is ready for you. Also the nursery has been refurbished for Miss Grace. Your mother has hired a nanny to take care of her for you."  
  
Kate frowned. "I won't be needing the nanny," she informed him. "Grace stays with me."  
  
"As you wish, Miss," James replied. "Dinner is at seven, if you would like a chance to refresh..."  
  
"I won't be dining with my parents, this evening," Kate informed him. "Grace and I will be in my room. If you would be so kind as to ask Matilda to send up a plate of food - nothing fancy, I would appreciate it. We're rather tired."  
  
"Of course, Miss," James smiled at her. "Matty has been preparing your favorite - beef and noodles."  
  
Kate smiled wanly. "That sounds wonderful." Picking up Grace she continued into the house - through the foyer, up the sweeping staircase and down the right hall. She opened the fifth door on the right, holding her breath, unsure of what her mother might have done. Fortunately, her mother's touch had seemingly passed this room by. It still looked the same as when she had last lived here. No flowers, no chintzes, no odd half naked statuary. Just plain and simple. Their cabin would have fit into this one room four times over.  
  
Kate looked down at her sleepy daughter. "How about taking a nap, Grace?"  
  
"No bath?"  
  
"No, no bath tonight," Kate smiled. "Mama's too tired."  
  



	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2  
  
Kate stood outside the dinning room, drawing in a deep breath to prepare herself for what was to come. She had to face her family at some point, it might as well be now. Even though she hadn't seen them in five years, all she felt was dread. Her mother's voice, solioguizing on the importance of the work done by the Ladies Auxillary, was already getting on Kate's nerves as she listend from the hall. And her sister's high pitched laugh had only worsened over time. How was it that she was related to such senseless women?  
  
"Mama?" Grace asked quietly. Since they had left China she had been much more subdued. Kate knew that she missed Danny desperately. They both did.  
  
Kate tried to smile reassuringly. "Come on Grace. Let's go have some breakfast." She picked her up and walked calmly into the room. All eyes turned towards them. Her mother even stopped talking. "Good morning, everyone," she said as cheerfully as possible, feeling extremely uncomfortable as they all stared at her silently.  
  
"Kate Darling!" her mother recovered first, rising out of her seat and sweeping towards them to evelope them in a perfumed hug. "Darling," she said as she pressed her cheek to Kate's.  
  
"Mother," Kate responded, kissing the air next to her mother's cheek, in their usual greeting.  
  
"Let me look at you!" Kate felt her mother's eyes flick over her and Grace's appearances. She could tell that her mother was shocked, but trying to hide it. "You look wonderful!" she finally declared.  
  
"You were always a bad liar, Mother," Kate told her, patting her on the shoulder.  
  
Julianna wasn't as kind. "You look dreadful." Kate smiled at that. Julianna hadn't changed.  
  
"Julianna!" her mother gasped.  
  
"Well, she does," her sister pointed out. "Where did you get that dress? It's hanging on you. And look at your hair! You have circles under your eyes and....."  
  
"That's enough, Julianna," their father interrupted.  
  
Kate looked over at her father who hadn't risen from the table. "That's quite all right, Dad," she told him as she walked over towards him. "I'm aware of how..'dreadful' I look. Unfortunately, 4 weeks living on ships, trains and planes, doesn't do much for a person's appearance. Some how I just never made it to a decent modiste." She leaned down to kiss his cheek.  
  
"It's good to see you," he told her, patting her awkwardly. "You'll have to excuse your mother and sister. It was only last week that I told them that you were alive and on your way home."  
  
"That's right," Julianna chimed in. "We've been mourning you for almost two years."  
  
"Yes, I imagine you have," Kate replied. "Just stopped wearing black, I suppose. It must have been dreadful for you. It has never been your color."  
  
Julianna floundered comically. "I wore black for awhile, but it isn't necessary........"  
  
Her father held up his hand to silence her. "Don't bait your sister," he told Kate. "So, is this Grace?" he asked, changeing topics.  
  
Kate nodded. "Grace, this your Grandpa Richard," Kate introduced her. Grace was not used to the attention, so she hid her face.  
  
Not to be left out, Kate's mother hurried over, her arms open. "And I'm your Grandma, Darling." She tried to hug Grace, but was unable to. Frowning, she looked up at Kate.   
  
"She's not used to being around other people," Kate explained. "She misses her home. She'll get used to you eventually, just don't push her."  
  
Her mother looked disappointed. "But we've waited so long to see her! Give Grandma a hug," she cajoled. Grace squirmed away.  
  
"Mother!"  
  
"Jane, that's enough," Kate's father barked. "Give the child some space. I'm sure the last few weeks have been very hard on her. And Kate. They don't need you clinging."  
  
"But Richard," she whined, like a small child.  
  
"Give her time, Jane," he said more kindly.  
  
Obviously miffed, her mother returned to her seat. "James," she called over her shoulder. "Please inform Miss Jones that she is needed here." Turning to smile over at Kate, she became the hostess that she had always aspired to be. "Please help yourself to anything on the sideboard. I'm sure you remember what a good cook Matilda is."  
  
Giving her mother a disbelieving look, Kate moved to get her and Grace some breakfast. Some things never changed. Her mother was just as superficial and proper as before. The sight of all the food displayed on the side board caused Kate's stomach to heave. This amount, set out to feed 4 adults, could have fed her and Danny and Grace for a week at least. Selecting some simple scrambled eggs and toast for Grace, and some toast and fruit for herself, Kate returned to the table.   
  
"Is that all your going to eat?" Julianna asked.   
  
"Julianna!" her mother scolded mildly.  
  
"Well," Julianna pouted, "she could stand to gain a little weight you know."  
  
Kate tried to smile at her sister. "My stomach hasn't settled yet. And I'm not used to such a rich diet, I wouldn't want to overdo it on my first day, now would I?"  
  
They ate quietly for awhile, though the silence was anything but comfortable. Grace picked at her food, awed by her surroundings and the people staring at her. Kate forced herself to eat each bite of toast.  
  
James appeared at the doorway, bowing formally. "Miss Jones, Ma'am," he intoned. A woman, older than Kate and dressed rather severely in a brown dress with her hair scraped back in a bun, entered behind the butler.  
  
"You wished to see me, Ma'am?" she asked Kate's mother.  
  
"Oh, yes! Miss. Jones," she chirped, her voice falsely excited. Kate felt her stomach tighten. Her mother was going to try something. "Kate, I'd like you to meet Miss Jones. I've taken the liberty of hiring her to help you with Grace. She comes very highly recommended. Verna Maplethrope simply adores her. She was wonderful with her girls - do you remember Maggie and Amanda? They're both married now, to wonderful men, and it's in part due to Miss Jones, here. She's helped us to refurbish the nursery so that Grace will have all that she needs to become a proper young lady in New York society.."  
  
Kate looked at her mother as she babbled. "No," was all she said.  
  
"and she....No?" her mother trailed off. "Whatever do you mean, Darling?" she asked, her bewilderment showing on her face.  
  
"I mean no," Kate told her. "Grace does not need Miss Jones, no matter how highly recommended she comes. She stays with me. I will take care of her." Kate looked up at the forbidding looking woman. "I'm sorry that my mother has given you hope of employment, but your services are not needed." Turning back to her toast, Kate continued to eat, though each bite tasted like sawdust.   
  
"Kate," her mother said, the tone of her voice saying that she was trying to reason with her stubborn daughter, "Miss Jones is highly recommended. She will do wonders for Grace. You can't expect to take care of her full time."  
  
"I have since she's been born," Kate pointed out.  
  
"Well, that was different," her mother pressed. "You're here with us now. We can afford to take care of her properly."  
  
Kate raised an eyebrow. "I haven't been taking care of her properly?" she asked. "I'm her mother. I will take care of her. She doesn't need a nanny."  
  
"But Kate..." Waving a hand absently, her mother dismissed Miss Jones, who quickly bowed out of the room.  
  
"No, Mother. She's already had to leave behind her father and the only home she's ever known." Her mother stiffened and Julianna's fork stopped half way to her mouth. "I'm not going to leave her so that she can be raised by someone else because that's how things are done in New York."  
  
"Her father is dead," her mother said stiffly.  
  
Kate eyed everyone at the table, seeing the tension, the wariness. She understood instantly that Danny was to be one of the untouchable subjects. Five years ago, she would have read the signs and gone along with it, but not this time. Not now. She wasn't going to hide Danny from them, to pretend that he didn't exsist.  
  
"Her father, the only father she has ever known," Kate told them calmly, "is still in China."  
  
"Micheal died last December."   
  
"Micheal," Kate said, her contempt for him obvious, "only contributed biologically. Danny is Grace's father."  
  
"Who is he? What does he do?" Her mother demanded, as if these were the most important questions when talking about a person. "I can't believe you would leave your husband for some pilot."  
  
"I've heard of this," Julianna piped in. "It's called the Florence Nighengale syndrome. Nurses fall in love with the men they take care of. Micheal told us how you saved this pilot's life. He showed us the medal he got for getting the other pilots to safety," she gave a sigh. "I certainly wouldn't leave my husband for some....pilot!" she declared, her mouth forming a small frown of disdain. "However would he support me?!"  
  
Kate looked at her sister with undisguised disgust. "Oh, I'm sure Micheal told you a lot," she told her sister. "Probably none of it was true."  
  
Her mother's cheek's flushed. "Are you saying Micheal lied to us?"  
  
Kate looked her directly in the eyes. "Yes, that's exactly what I'm telling you."  
  
"How could you say such a thing!" her mother demanded. "Micheal was a true gentleman. He..."  
  
"Told you that Grace and I were dead," Kate interjected.  
  
Her mother paused. "Well, that was different," she floundered. "He was trying to spare us the pain of knowing that you left your husband for some pilot."  
  
"I left my husband?" Kate asked.  
  
"Yes," her mother nodded emphatically. "He told us how the pilot held a knife to his throat and that you told him to leave. That you refused to go with him. He was torn apart by it."  
  
Kate laughed humorlessly.  
  
"Do you deny it," her mother asked.  
  
"No," Kate said, shaking her head. "Danny held a knife to Micheal's throat. He saved my life."  
  
"What nonsense is that? Micheal would never be a threat to his own wife!"  
  
"You don't know Micheal, Mother," Kate told her.  
  
"Elizabeth and Robert raised a perfect gentleman. Micheal was..."  
  
"A monster," Kate interjected again. Standing Kate took Grace's hand. "I suppose Daddy has kept that unpleasnt information from you, as usual. But I'm sure he knows what kind of man I was married too." Seeing the look of affirmation in her father's eyes, Kate wanted to cry. She had hoped that she wasn't right, that he hadn't known, that he hadn't sacraficed his older daughter for profit and connections. Nodding stiffly, she turned to leave the room.  
  
"Kate," he called after her. She stopped but didn't turn around. "I know now, but I didn't always know."  
  
"When?" Kate asked. When he remained silent, she turned to face him. "When did you find out?" she demanded.  
  
He looked away from her. "Four months after your wedding. I heard some rumors, I did some investigating."  
  
"You knew that long ago, and yet you left me there," Kate said, her feeling of betrayal evident in the thickness of her voice. "You had no trouble pulling strings to get me out of there in the middle of a war, but you couldn't do it earlier? I sure hope you got what you wanted. I hope my happiness and well being were worth it. You knew, or could at least guess what my life was like, yet you left me over there. You left Danny there." Kate felt even more used and abused than she did after Micheal would have a go at her. She was little more than a bargaining tool to her father. She always had been. She turned to leave again.  
  
"Kate," he called after her. "I'm sorry. If I could make it up to you......" Kate paused at the doorway.  
  
"Get Danny out of there," she told him before walking away. As far as she was concerned, they were no longer related.  
  
  



	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3  
  
Kate smiled as Grace raced around the nursery with a toy plane held high over her head. "I fly like Dandy," she told her mother proudly.  
  
"Yes you do," Kate agreed. "Dandy would be very impressed with how well you fly." Grace giggled as she continued to make zooming noises.  
  
It had been a week since the infamous breakfast scene. Kate had talked to neither her father or her sister in that time. Her mother had ventured into the nursery twice to try to convince her of the necessity of using the 'highly recommended' Miss Jones, but Kate wouldn't listen, so she finally gave up. Since then Kate and Grace had seen only James, Matilda, and the maids as they silently went about their work. Occasionally they would walk to Central Park if the weather wasn't too sweltering, but for the most part they played in nursery. There were more toys then Grace knew what to do with, but she was doing her best to work her way through them.  
  
"I want Dandy," Grace said plainatively, standing next to her mother. Kate hadn't noticed that the plane noises had stopped as she gazed out the widow. She looked down at Grace, seeing her lower lip beginning to tremble. Picking her up, Kate hugged her tightly. "I know, sweetheart. Mama misses him too," Kate told her as she blinked her eyes rapidly trying not to cry.  
  
"We go home soon?" Grace asked.  
  
Startled, Kate looked at her daughter. She had never considered China to be home, they were just bidding their time, but she had forgotten that it was the only home Grace had ever known. "No, sweetheart. We're not going back."  
  
Graces eyes filled with tears. "But I want Dandy!"  
  
"I know, Gracie," Kate told her, hugging her tightly again. "But we can't go back. Dandy's coming to us."  
  
"He come here?" she asked excitedly.  
  
Kate shook her head, hating to disappoint her daughter again. "No Grace. Not here. He's going to meet us somewhere else," she paused. "Do you remember the stories Dandy would tell you about the farm where he grew up and his friend Rafe?" Grace nodded. She loved Danny's stories. "That's where Dandy is going to meet us."  
  
"Now?"   
  
Kate shook her head sadly. "Not yet."  
  
"Soon?"  
  
Kate smiled at Grace's persistance. "Maybe. I don't know. China is a very long way away, Grace. Remember it took us a long time to get here."  
  
That didn't seem to bother Grace. She smiled up at her mother. "No problem," she declared, sounding heartbreakingly like Danny. "Dandy can fly!" she wiggled out of her mother's arms and ran accross the room.  
  
"Where are you going?" Kate called out after her, laughing at her sudden exhuberance.  
  
Grace turned to look at her, her head cocked to the side. "I get ready to go."  
  
Kate looked puzzled. "Go where?" she asked. "It's raining. We can't go to the park today."  
  
Grace shook her head. "No. No park," Grace told her. "Get ready for the farm."  
  
Kate quickly caught up with her daughter and knelt down in front of her. "Grace, I'm sorry sweetie. We can't go to the farm yet. But soon," Kate promised as she saw the tears forming again. "We'll go soon. I promise, okay? Mama doesn't know how to fly, so we'll have to go by train. Okay, Grace?" Grace nodded sullenly, her lip pouting, obviously not happy. "Dandy might not be there for a while, though, Grace," Kate warned her daughter. "He might not be able to find a plane. It could take him a long time to get to us."  
  
Crossing her arms, Grace stared stubbornly up at her mother. "Dandy will come!" she declared.  
  
Kate smiled, stroking Graces hair gently. "Yes, he will," she agreed, wishing with all her heart that she had the same strength of her beliefs as Grace. Kate knew that Danny would come home to them - or die trying, and that was what scared her so much. "Why don't you play some more, then we'll go down and see what Matty made for lunch," Kate suggested.  
  
"Can we have sketti?" she asked.  
  
"We'll have to ask Matty, but I think it will be okay," Kate replied.  
  
"Okay." And once again Grace was flying about the room.  
  
Oh, to be young again, Kate thought. To believe wholeheartedly that your parents would do what they promised. To know that their love was unconditional and unbreakable. She only prayed that Grace would know that for the rest of her life and never be disappointed as she had been.  
  
  



	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4  
  
They had just returned to the nursery after Grace's nap when James knocked on the door.  
  
"Excuse me, Miss," he interrupted their game. "Your mother would like to see you and Miss Grace in the drawing room."  
  
"Why," Kate asked suspiciously.  
  
"Mr. and Mrs. Helmsford have come to see Miss Grace, " he informed her.  
  
Kate blanched. "Thank you, James," she said. "We'll be down shortly."  
  
"I'll inform your mother and her guests," he replied politely as he exited the room.  
  
Kate's stomach heaved and she ran quickly to the nursery bathroom. Trembling she watched as her lunch swirled down the toilet. She had never felt comfortable in the presence of Micheal's mother. Mrs. Helmsford was cold and haughty. She looked down upon everyone - except her beloved Micheal.  
  
She and Grace had to get out of here soon. Kate had been dreading the long train ride to Tennessee, but anything was better than having to deal with the Helmsfords. Even finally meeting Evelyn. Kate knew that by inviting the Helmsford for tea her mother was opening the way for introducing her back into society, but only if she had the Helmsfords' approval as their son's grieving widow. Kate wondered, not for the first time, how out of touch with reality her mother was.  
  
Rinsing her mouth and straightening her hair, Kate called out to Grace. "Come on, Sweetheart. It's time to go meet some new people."  
  
"Don wanna," Grace called out from her reading nook.  
  
"Neither do I," Kate informed her. "But we have to." Holding out her hand, Kate waited for Grace to climb out of her cubby hole. She briefly debated changing Grace into a proper dress, but quickly decided against it. Grace didn't like dresses and Kate didn't want anyone to think that she and Grace were going to give in to their social pressures.  
  
Her mother was chattering away about the sudden change in the weather, her voice high and nervous sounding as it always was when she was with someone she considered her social superior. Clearing her throat discreetly, Kate caught her mother's attention.  
  
"Here she is!" her mother declared gaily, her relief evident. "Kate darling, come in, come in. Elizabeth, James, you remember Kate. - Of course you do, she's your daughter-in-law," she babbled. "She married your Micheal. And this," she reached to pat Grace, who avoided the touch, "this little angel is Grace."  
  
Kate glared at her mother, willing her to shut up. "Mr. and Mrs. Helmsford," she nodded politely as she sat down accross from them, pulling Grace into her lap.  
  
"Kate," Mr. Helmsford acknowledge with a nod.  
  
Mrs. Helmsford said nothing as she studied Grace, her eyes flicking distastefully over Kate.  
  
"Hello, Grace," she finally said. "I am your Grandmother." Grace said nothing, her eyes wide as she stared at the forbidding woman in black. "Does she speak?" she demanded of Kate's mother.  
  
"I believe..." Mrs. Williams began hesitantly.  
  
"Of course she speaks," Kate interrupted her mother. "She simply isn't used to strangers."  
  
Looking down her nose at Kate, Elizabeth Helmsford replied haughtily. "I am her grandmother. I am hardly some stranger off the street."  
  
Kate had to keep herself from rolling her eyes. "But she doesn't know you," Kate pointed out reasonably. "You are a stranger to her."  
  
"Nonsense!" Mrs. Helmsford declared loudly, causing Grace to jump. "Grace, you were named after me. My name is Elizabeth, just like you: Grace Elizabeth Helmsford. Your father was my son."  
  
Grace looked up at her mother, "Dandy?" she whispered hesitantly.  
  
Kate started to shake her head no, but Mrs. Helmsford interrupted her. "That's right Grace. Your daddy was my son, and he named you after me."  
  
"Her name is Grace Marie," Kate said calmly. "She was named after my grandmother. And as for her father, she was not referring to Micheal, but to Daniel Walker. The man who has been her father since she was six months old."  
  
Mrs. Helmsford's nostrils flared and her eyes narrowed. "Oh, yes. The pilot," she said as if the word tasted bad in her mouth. "Micheal told us about him. The thankless man who seduced his wife while Micheal was risking his own life to save the man's friends. Who later held a knife to my son's throat and threatened to kill him if he tried to come near you," she told them dramatically.  
  
Kate laughed, shocking both her mother and Mrs. Helmsford, but not Mr. Helmsford.  
  
"You laugh at this," Mrs. Helmsford demanded indignantly. "You mock my son's pain and disappointment at being abandoned by his wife? Do you deny that this happened?" her face flushed with anger.  
  
"No, I don't deny it," Kate replied calmly, controlling her outburst of laughter. "In fact, I was marveling at Micheal's storytelling abilities. There's just enough of the truth to make it believeable." She turned to look at Micheal's father. "But you probably knew that already, didn't you?" she asked quietly. She had come to the conclusion over the past week that her father and Micheal's father had been partners in crime. She could remember many terse conversations Micheal had had with his father before their marriage. Maybe her father wasn't the only one who gained something from the marriage.  
  
Mrs. Helmsford broke apart the staring contest between Kate and her husband. "Micheal had no reason to lie. You just admitted yourself that it was the truth.."  
  
"I said it was enough of the truth," Kate told her. "Do you want the whole truth?" Kate asked Mrs. Helmsford, but her eyes were locked with Micheal's father. At his slight nod, Kate interrupted Mrs. Helmsford angry tirade.  
  
"Micheal was assigned to watch the coast for the Doolittle raiders. He took me and Grace - who was only 4 months old at the time - and left us alone near a small coastal village. We didn't see him for 2 months. During that time I rescued 5 of the Raiders who crashed nearby. Four were sent home, but one of them, Captain Daniel Walker, I nursed back to health. He was shot in the back while saving his friend's life." Mrs. Helmsford 'harrumfed' in disbelief and Kate glared at her. "He nearly bled to death. Then one of his wounds became infected and he started running a high fever. He was unconscious and delerious for 3 weeks. When he held a knife to Micheal's throat he had been mobile for less than a week. Micheal could have knocked him down easily."  
  
"Micheal would...." Mrs. Helmsford began.  
  
"Did you ever stop to think why a wounded pilot would attack a healthy man of Micheal's size?" Kate interrupted conversationally. "Could it be that he was saving my life?"  
  
Mrs. Helmsford puffed up indignantly. "Are you insinuating that Micheal would ever be a threat to you?" she asked angrily.  
  
Kate turned to look at her. "No, I'm not insinuating it. I'm stating a fact. Micheal would have strangled me to death if Danny hadn't stopped him."  
  
Mrs. Helmsford stood up. "This is nonsense," she declared stonily. "That you would besmirch Micheal's memory like this! It's disgusting."  
  
"It's the truth," Kate replied as she slowly stroked Grace's trembling shoulders. Once again she was caught between warring adults. "I know it. And I believe your husband knows it."  
  
Mrs. Helmsford glanced quickly down at her husband who had yet to say anything, her cheeks flushing hotly. "This is all nonsense. It's time to go, Robert," she ordered, tapping her husband none to gently with her umbrella. "We do not have to listen to these vicious lies." She stalked away, her back ramrod straight. At the doorway she turned to face Kate. "Tomorrow is Micheal's birthday and the six month anniversary of his unfortunate death. We came to invite you to the memorial that we plan to have in his honor. To introduce you - and Grace - back into society as my son's widow, but now that I know you for what you are...." she trailed off in disgust, her nose wrinkling with disdain. "I don't want you even remotely associated with Micheal's good name."  
  
"How did he die?" Kate asked, unmoved my her mother-in-law's condemnation of her.  
  
"He was murdered," Mrs. Helmsford sniffed delicately.  
  
"Where?" Kate asked.  
  
"What does it matter where?" Mrs Helmsford demanded hotly. "He was murdered. He will never see his child grow up. Though I am thankful that he doesn't have to bear the betrayal of the wife he chose to share his life with."  
  
Kate turned to Mr. Helmsford. "Where?" she asked again.  
  
He replied, not even flinching when he named a seedy street well known for catering to all kinds of vices. Kate nodded, expecting as much.  
  
"He was lost!" his mother declared, her voice rising in denial. "He would never go there willingly. He was lost. Tell her James!"  
  
Kate looked at her mother-in-law sadly. She didn't like Mrs. Helmsford, but she could begin to understand her unwillingness to believe anything bad about her son. "Oh yes, he was lost, Mrs. Helmsford," Kate agreed with her, sadly. "He was lost a long time ago. But not on that night. He knew exactly what he was doing."  
  
Without a word, Mrs. Helmsford turned and stalked out of the room. Mr. Helmsford stood, but didn't move to leave.  
  
"Grace is a fine child," he told her. "Just like her mother."  
  
"Thank you," Kate nodded.  
  
"Robert!" His wife called shrilly from the foyer.  
  
He glance behind him, then tipped his hat. "I'm sorry," he said softly before he left.  
  
Kate sank back into her chair, all the tension draining from her body. Closing her eyes she offered up a small prayer of thankfulness. Glancing over, she saw the pale face of her mother who was still sitting stiffly in her chair. She hadn't uttered a single word since shortly after Kate had entered the room.  
  
"That went rather well, I think," Kate declared brightly, taking some pity on her poor woman who was only just recovering from the storm that had engulfed her drawing room.  
  
Her mother's mouth opened and closed several times. "Went well?" she questioned hysterically. "How can you think that it went well?!"  
  
"Mother, how can you have expected it to go any other way?" Kate asked as if speaking to a child. She got up and kissed her mother's cheek and then left the room, heading towards the nursery. It was time to make plans. It was time to get to Tennessee like she had promised Danny. She would believe, as Grace did, that Danny would be there soon.  
  
  
  



	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5  
  
Evelyn watched Danny as he chased after his new puppy, Ramsey. A boy and his dog, she smiled. Rafe's arms wrapped around her waist pulling her close to him. She rested her head back against his chest, feeling his warmth and strength flowing through her.  
  
"I'd say the gift is a success," he told her, his chin resting on the top of her head.  
  
"I'd say so," Evelyn replied, "but I still can't help thinking he's a little too young."  
  
Rafe smiled. They had had this discussion before. "I was the same age when I got my first dog," he pointed out. "It will give him someone to play with - besides you and me. He's only two, but I know he gets lonely sometimes. He and the pup can grow up together. In a year or two they'll be inseperable."  
  
"I guess." Evelyn sighed. It felt so good to have Rafe's arms around her again. In the two years since their marriage and Danny's birth he had only been home for two weeks at a time. She and Danny had seen him for a total of 6 weeks. But now he was back for good. The war wasn't over, but Rafe's position in it was. He'd done his part and now he was free to live his life.  
  
Rafe chuckled as the puppy bit the seat of Danny's pants, dragging him away from the ball they were playing with. "You know," Rafe said after a moments silence, "Now that I'm back, it just might be time to start thinking about a little brother or sister for Danny." He leaned down to kiss Evelyn's cheek. "What do you think?" he whispered softly.  
  
Turning in his arms, Evelyn smiled, her love for Rafe shinning through her eyes. "I think that's a wonderful idea."  
  
"You are so beautiful," Rafe whispered as he leaned down to kiss his wife, the passion and desire still between them after all this time and months of seperation.  
  
Their kiss was cut short by the high pitched barking of Ramsey and the honking of horn coming up the drive.  
  
Looking up, Rafe's brow creased. "I wonder who'd take a taxi all the way out here?" he said. "Are you expecting anyone, Ev?"  
  
She shook her head. "No," she called back over her shoulder as she retrieved Danny and Ramsey from the front drive. Rafe walked down the stairs to join his wife and son, curious as to who was visiting.  
  
The taxi rolled to a stop and it's driver quickly exited.   
  
"Evening George," Rafe called to the man. "What brings you out here?"  
  
The man looked up at them flustered, as he opened the back door. "I only bring them where they want to go, not where they need to go. I told her she should go to the hospital, but she wouldn't listen to me. She's been....."  
  
"I'm quite all right," a woman's voice said from the interior of the car.  
  
"Begging your pardon, ma'am," George said, touching his cap, "but you've had me pull over this here car 5 times since you've been in it. I didn't know a body could throw up as much as you have. Can't be healthy."  
  
Hearing that the passanger was sick, Evelyn moved around to the side of the taxi. There she met the luminous green eyes of a pale stranger. "Are you all right?" she asked, her professional training kicking in.  
  
The woman nodded, her face turning a bit more green at the slight movement. "I'll be fine. I just need to get out of this damn car and stop moving for a minute."  
  
Evelyn smiled slightly at the feistiness she saw in the woman's direct gaze. She reached out her hand and the woman accepted it after a moments hesitation, slowly getting out of the car. She took several deep breaths before she turned back towards the car. "Come on Gracie, we're here." Evelyn watched as a young girl, not much older than Danny bounced out of the car, obviously happy to leave it's confines. "Dandy?" she asked as she grabbed her mother's hand.  
  
The woman looked around, her eyes seeming to take everything in. "Not yet, sweetheart," she told her daughter as her eyes locked on Rafe and held. "Hello Rafe," she said, a relieved smile on her face. "Do you remember me?"  
  
Startled, Evelyn glanced from the bewildered expression on her husband's face to the pale stranger. What was going on? She wondered. Eyes moving away from Rafe, the woman caught sight of Danny who was hiding behind his father's legs. With a small gasp, the woman's face paled even further and she slowly fell to the ground without a sound.  
  
  



	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6   
  
"Who is she Rafe?" Evelyn demanded.  
  
Rafe sighed in exasperation. "I told you. I don't know."  
  
"She seemed to know you well enough," Evelyn pointed out as she roughly began to fold some towels that had been sitting in a nearby hamper. Evelyn didn't know what to think. She could tell that Rafe's confusion was genuine. He didn't know who the stranger was, but that didn't make Evelyn feel any better. She couldn't stop replaying how the woman's eyes had lit up when she saw Rafe. She couldn't stop herself from looking for traces of Rafe in the woman's daughter. Not liking how her doubts were making her feel, Evelyn busied herself, waiting for the woman to wake up.  
  
For his part, Rafe looked back and forth between his wife and the strange woman. He knew what Evelyn was thinking. He could see the traces of betrayal in her eyes, but he knew he was innocent. He didn't know who this woman was and he certainly didn't know who the father of her child was. With her eyes closed the woman didn't look familar to him at all, but there had been a moment, when her eyes had met his, that he thought he might have known her - might have seen her before, but he just wasn't sure.   
  
He ran his hand over his face in frustration, seeing Evelyn's glare. "Jesus, Evelyn. She doesn't even look like me!" he exclaimed softly.  
  
Evelyn's eyes snapped up to meet his. "Did I say anything about..."  
  
"No," Rafe said, shaking his head, "but I know what you're thinking it. I don't know who she is." A small shuffling sound broke off their staring contest. The little girl was looking up at them with wide green eyes.  
  
"Mama?" she asked softly, her voice trembling.  
  
Evelyn immediately knelt down in front of her. "Your mama is fine, sweetheart," she told her. "She's just a little tired right now. Did you see all the toys in Danny's room?" The girl's eyes lit up with excitment. "You can go play with them until your mama wakes up, okay?"  
  
"Dandy?!" she asked, excitedly.  
  
Evelyn glanced up at Rafe, who shrugged, not understanding what she was saying. "Danny," Evelyn repeated. "My little boy. You can play with his toys." The little girl's smile faltered a bit, confusing Evelyn. What child didn't like toys?  
  
"Dandy here?" the girl asked again.  
  
Evelyn shook her head in confusion. "I don't know who Dandy is, sweetheart," she explained gently. The little girl's lip began to tremble as her eyes filled with tears.  
  
"Dandy come to Rafe's farm," she explained, though it made no sense to Rafe and Evelyn. Evelyn looked up at Rafe, her eyebrow raised in question. 'I don't know,' he mouthed silently to her.  
  
Evelyn tried to smile cheerfully. "Well, Dandy's not here yet. But we'll let you know okay?" Evelyn promised. "Why don't you go play. Your mama will wake up soon." The little girl stared at her mother for a moment, but then turned and headed back for Danny's room and his toys.  
  
Rafe and Evelyn watched her go, both wondering who Dandy was and why he - or she - would come to their farm. "So whose Dandy?" Evelyn asked Rafe.  
  
"Evelyn," Rafe said, exasperated. "I don't know any 'Dandy,' I don't know this woman, and I'm not that girl's father!" He turned to leave the room, but was stopped when he heard a small cough from the bed. They both turned to see a pair another pair of green eyes looking at them.  
  
"How are you feeling," Evelyn asked, going over to the side of the bed. "Nausous?"  
  
"I'm feeling better," the woman replied, "now that I'm not rocking or bouncing," she smiled wanly as she moved to sit up. Evelyn went to help her, but the woman waved her away. "I'm fine, really."  
  
Once seated, she looked up at Rafe. "I'm sorry for the confusion. This isn't the way I planned this. We've been traveling for 5 days, and I realize I should have gotten a hotel for the night, but I just wanted to get here..." Kate trailed off, realizing that she was babbling. "And I certainly didn't mean to cause a problem between you two," she told Evelyn. With a sigh, she looked down at her hands. "This isn't how I expected to finally meet you," she explained to Evelyn, her cheeks flushing slightly.  
  
"Finally?" Evelyn questioned softly, glancing up at Rafe, who shrugged once again.  
  
"I'm real sorry," Rafe said, "I get the feeling that I should know who you are, but I can't seem to place you."  
  
Kate shook her head. "I should have realized that," she told him. "We only met very briefly and you had a lot of other things on your mind. It's just that I've heard so much about you, Captain McCawley," she explained, using his rank as she had before. "I feel like I know you and I just forgot that you probably wouldn't know me."  
  
Rafe squinted at her, racking his brain to figure out where he might have met her. There was still something about her eyes that made him pause. Where had he seen her before?  
  
"When did you meet my husband?" Evelyn asked, watching them both.  
  
Kate didn't take her eyes off Rafe. "It was just over 2 years ago. Grace - my daughter, was only 4 and half months old, so she's definitly not Rafe's child," Kate smiled as Evelyn blushed. "Though there is some irony in you thinking so," she couldn't help commenting.  
  
Suddenly Rafe drew in a long, painful breath, his nerves stretched taunt. "China," he exhaled. "You were the one who rescued us in China."   
  
Kate nodded. "Like I said, you had a lot on your mind at the time, I shouldn't have expected you to remember me."  
  
"I remember," Rafe whispered, his knuckles white where he gripped the foot board. He remembered that night in vivid detail. The night his best friend died saving his life. The night he left his best friend behind. There wasn't a day that went by that he didn't think of Danny and the sacrafice his friend had made for him, especially now when he saw little Danny every day. He had managed to carry on with his life, but the pain of losing Danny was never far beneath the surface, ready to hit him at odd moments.  
  
Evelyn got up and walked over to her husband, taking his hand in her hers. "Rafe?" she questioned gently, seeing the pain in his eyes. Kate saw it to, and she was sorry that she had delievered her news so clumsily. Danny often had the same look when he was thinking about Rafe.  
  
"You made me promise you something before you left," Kate told him. "Do you remember what it was?"  
  
Rafe nodded, his throat working spasmodically. Evelyn looked between them, unsure of what was being left unsaid. "What...?" she began to ask.  
  
"I made her promise to....." he cleared his throat, "to bring Danny home." He looked up at her expectantly, waiting to hear if she had completed her promised task. Waiting to hear if he could finally sleep easy, knowing that his best friend's body was finally at rest back home in Tennessee.   
  
Kate opened her mouth to tell him that Danny wasn't dead, but Grace came bounding into the room. "Mama," she cried, throwing herself into her mother's arms.  
  
"Hey Gracie," Kate said, hugging her close. "Mama's just fine. Don't you worry, okay?"  
  
Grace nodded teary eyed. "Dandy's not here," she pouted.  
  
Kate looked up at Rafe. "Not yet," she told her daughter, "but soon."  
  
Evelyn looked at her curiously. "She was asking for Dandy earlier, we didn't know who she meant, but she seemed quite sure that he - or she - was coming here."  
  
Kate smiled weakly, knowing that what she had to say was going to come as a big shock to them both. "He promised he would," Kate told them.   
  
Nodding, Evelyn looked up at Rafe worriedly. "Should we know who he is too?" she asked.  
  
"Dandy is what Grace calls the only father that she has ever known," Kate explained, her heart pounding in her ears. She didn't know how to tell them gently so that the shock wouldn't be too much. "She's referring to Danny Walker. Captain Daniel Joshua Walker," she explained more fully.  
  
Both Rafe and Evelyn paled at her words. "No," Rafe whispered, his eyes wide.  
  
"Danny didn't die, Rafe," she told him. Evelyn gasped, her hands covering her mouth as her eyes began to fill with tears.  
  
"He died," Rafe's voice shook with emotion. "You told me he died. I saw him...the blood....the wounds... Danny died."  
  
Kate shook her head in sympathy. "I'm sorry Rafe, I didn't mean to tell you like this. I don't know how I was going to tell you, but...." She trailed off helplessly. She looked over at Evelyn hoping to explain it to her. "Danny almost bled to death, but we managed to stop it. He was awake enough to know what was going on around him. He thought he was dying and he didn't want Rafe to wait around or take him and risk the rest of the men. He had me tell Rafe that he died, that way Rafe would leave." She looked over at Rafe. "He knew that you were stubborn enough to wait around." Rafe shook his head in denial. "He thought he was dying, Rafe," she tried to explain. "He almost did, but his only wish was for you to get out of China and back here to take care of Evelyn." Kate looked over at the stricken face of Danny's one time love and felt sorry for her. To be shocked like this twice in one lifetime was not fair.  
  
"No!" Rafe roared from the foot of the bed, his eyes squeezed closed. "No. Danny died. You, your just crazy. You...."  
  
"Danny's alive," Kate told him. "He almost died - several times, but he survived. Ask me anything," she challenged desperately. "Do you want me to tell you how he got the long scar on his leg? Or who your principal was at school? How about the first girl you kissed? Or he kissed? It was the same girl. Ask me anything!" Kate demanded, wanting to prove to Rafe that his friend was indeed alive.  
  
Suddenly a small bundle of fur jumped onto her bed, followed by a young toddler with Danny's eyes.   
  
"Ramsey!" the little boy called to the pup.  
  
"Ramsey," Kate repeated, unable to take her eyes off the child. "The name of the stray dog that you adopted when you were 11. Danny's father shot him for scaring the chickens." Looking up at Rafe, Kate saw that he was finally believing her, his face loosing all it's color. Nodding at young Danny, she asked softly, not taking her eyes off Rafe; "Ask me who his father is."  
  
"Oh my god," Rafe said as he dropped heavily onto the chair behind him. "Oh my God."  
  
Kate looked over at Evelyn, seeing the tears streaming down her face. "I'm sorry," she told her. "I didn't mean to come in here and...." she waved her hand helplessly. "This isn't how I planned to tell you."  
  
"Is he," Evelyn tried to speak through her tears. "Is he okay?" she asked.  
  
Kate felt her eyes tear up. "I hope so," she told Evelyn. "I hope so."  
  
  



	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7  
  
Kate looked up at Evelyn as they peeled vegetables for the night's dinner. She and Grace had suddenly appeared on their doorstep four days ago, but Rafe and Evelyn had shown them nothing but kindness despite their shock. In fact, they had welcomed her more warmly than her family. Not that that was hard to do. They had accepted her without question because Danny had sent her and Kate was surprised how at home she felt.  
  
But despite how comfortable she felt with them, they still had yet to talk about what was uppermost in all their minds - Danny. Rafe had made a brief plea that first night for some time and Kate was more than willing to give him all that he needed after the clumsy way she had given her news. She hadn't seen much of him since then, only at meals, but she heard the crop duster's engine enough to know where he spent most of his time. When she did see him he looked drawn and haggard, his eyes belying how sleepless his nights had been.  
  
Throwing a potato onto their growing pile, Kate took a steadying breath. "How's Rafe doing?" she finally asked softly, breaking the comfortable silence.  
  
Evelyn looked up, startled. Until now they had only spoken of innocuous topics such as the children or gardening. They had skirted around any topic that dealt with the news that Danny was alive. "He's coping," she answered, her cheeks flushing slightly. "We both are."  
  
Kate nodded. "I'm sorry for the way everything came out. I didn't mean to shock you both so badly. I..."  
  
"It's okay," Evelyn interrupted. "We've been mourning Danny for two years. It wouldn't have mattered how you told us, we'd still be in shock." She glanced out the kitchen window, hearing Rafe's plane circling for landing. "Rafe's dealing with a lot right now and he can't seem to talk about it - at least not with me. He's not the man that I first knew - before the war," she told Kate, feeling the relief of finally being able to talk to someone. "Danny's death took something away from him. It's like some part of him is missing. I didn't see it so much before because we only saw him so briefly, but since he's been back...." she faded away, thinking how to verbalize what she thought. "He hasn't talked about it with me, but I think he feels guilty. Danny died saving his life and then Rafe had to leave him behind. Logically that was the only thing he could do, but in his heart....he's never forgiven himself. And now you tell us that Danny was alive when he left and that he survived...."  
  
"It was Danny's choice," Kate interrupted, glad to finally be able to talk about all this. "He was dying, but he knew what he was doing." She looked up at Evelyn, making sure she had the woman's full attention. "He knew what he was leaving behind," she said softly.  
  
Evelyn stopped peeling for a moment, her eyes skittering away from Kate's. "So, he knew. He knows," she whispered, her voice hoarse. Kate nodded. Evelyn cleared her throat. "Rafe never said....I didn't know if you had guessed or if..."  
  
"Danny knew, " Kate repeated. "Rafe told him while he was dying - to give him something to live for, but he was injured pretty badly. He was so sure he was dying." Kate shivered, remembering those harrowing nights when she wasn't sure if he would live or die. "He almost did die three times. It's a miracle he survived, really," she told Evelyn with a slight smile. "But even then - his thoughts were of you. He wanted Rafe to get home to take care of you. It was very important to him - important enough to lie to his best friend, even though at the time he thought he was going to be dead soon." Kate paused, giving Evelyn time to absorb all this information. "He called for you while he was so sick," she told her softly.  
  
Evelyn looked up at her sharply, her eyes filled with tears. "He did?" she asked shakily.  
  
Kate smiled softly at her. "Yes he did," she replied. At one time Kate had been jealous of Evelyn's role in Danny's life, but not anymore. She could see how he could have fallen in love with her once, but she could also see how much Rafe and Evelyn loved each other. Evelyn wasn't a threat to her. Kate only wanted to put her at ease, to let her know that Danny loved her and Rafe and only wanted what was best for all of them. She knew that as happy as they were knowing that Danny was alive, they also had worries regarding how this would affect their lives and little Danny's. It was only natural and Kate wanted Evelyn to know that she didn't have to feel guilty about it.  
  
Evelyn wiped the tears from her cheeks, realizing that for the first time she felt totally comfortable in Kate's presence. She could see the sympathy in her new friend's eyes and also how deeply she cared. "When did he..." she tried to ask, her voice thick with emotion. "When did he tell you about me and...little Danny?" she asked.  
  
"We didn't talk about our pasts," Kate started slowly, "or rather, I didn't talk about anything in my past and Danny didn't talk about his time on Pearl. It was painful for both of us. We just focused on surviving day to day in the camp. He talked a lot about his childhood with Rafe and about their training days. He's a wonderful story teller. That's why I felt like I knew Rafe so well. Danny talked about him a lot, but he never mentioned you." She looked up at Evelyn, seeing the hurt in her eyes. "I knew of you, of course. He called for you while he was so sick, but he never spoke about you and I never asked. It was just too painful for him, I guess and I, well, I guess I didn't really want to know," she paused, and smiled shyly "until about 6 or 7 weeks ago. We had a fight - an arguement, I guess, and it all came out," she shrugged. "And two days later I was on my way home - without him - and he told me to come here." Kate's eyes filled with tears as they did everytime she thought of leaving Danny behind.  
  
Unexpectantly, Evelyn reached out to squeeze her hand. "He wanted you safe."  
  
Kate tried to smile. "I know," she said, wiping away her tears. "But that doesn't make it any easier."  
  
"I don't imagine that it does," Evelyn replied. They lapsed into silence, both of them lost in their own thoughts.  
  
"I loved him," Evelyn said softly, not looking at Kate. She didn't know why she had to tell Kate this, but she couldn't stop herself. For too many years she had kept her thoughts and feelings about Danny bottled up inside of her. She had only needed a sympathetic listener - someone who wasn't so intimately involved, and that person was Kate. Who better to understand how she had been drawn to Danny than the woman who loved him now? "He was there for me when I needed him after Rafe was shot down. We shared the same pain, but he was the one to comfort me. I didn't know him very well before....before everything happened between us, but now that I see how Rafe is without Danny I can see that Danny wasn't as....." she struggled for the right word, "...whole as he might have been before we were....together."   
  
Kate nodded encourageingly, sensing that Evelyn needed to talke to someone about what had happened.  
  
"I saw so much of Rafe in Danny and yet there were - are - so different. When we were together I didn't miss Rafe so much, but I also began to appreciate Danny for himself. He made me smile. He made me want to live again. He was so gentle and caring. He never pushed, but he was always there when I needed someone." She paused. "I never felt like I truly deserved him, not when I still loved Rafe so much. When I realized I was pregnant....I had to choose Danny. He had been there for me, he was the father of my child. I couldn't leave him. I couldn't hurt Danny like that. He was so loving..." she faded away, unable to put into words what she had felt.  
  
"He still is," Kate reminded her.  
  
Evelyn smiled tearily. "Yes, he still is," she repeated. "I can tell that Grace loves him immensely."  
  
"He's the only father she's ever known," Kate replied. "From the very beginning he was so good with her. So natural. He never minded that she wasn't really his."  
  
"Your husband?" Evelyn asked hesitantly.  
  
"Is dead," Kate replied, her face losing all the softness that was there when she spoke of Danny.  
  
"Oh, okay," Evelyn commented, surprised at the change in Kate. She waited to see if any more informatin was forthcoming.  
  
Kate tried to smile. "Micheal, my husband, was..." she faltered, unsure of how much she wanted to say. "He wasn't a good husband or father. He basically abandoned us there in China, " she shrugged. "Micheal was one of the issues that Danny and I had to work through. What Micheal meant to me and what you meant to him."  
  
"And did you?" Evelyn questioned.  
  
"Work through the issues?" Evelyn nodded. Kate smiled. "Yes, it took us a long time to get to the point that we could talk about it, but we did."  
  
"I'm glad," Evelyn told her. "Danny deserves to have someone love him as much as you obviously do." Evelyn paused, once again looking uncomfortable. "I loved him. I still love him," she repeated. "How can I not? He gave me Danny. I see him every time I look at my son."  
  
"He's a wonderful little boy," Kate interjected.  
  
"Yes, he is," Evelyn smiled.  
  
They paused, looking at each other, each trying to think of what to say next.  
  
"He loves Rafe a lot," Kate finally said.  
  
"Yes," Evelyn agreed with her.  
  
Kate looked around, feeling that Evelyn was waiting for her to say something more.   
  
"You and Rafe and Danny will have to talk when he gets here," Kate started hesitantly. "We didn't discuss...we didn't have time to discuss what he.....what..." she faltered. Taking a deep breath, Kate tried again. "Danny loves you all and I know that he would never want to disrrupt your lives. I think at one point he even considered never coming back."  
  
"But this is his home!" Evelyn exclaimed.  
  
"I know, but..." Kate shrugged. "Your happiness...your's and Rafe's and little Danny's, mean a lot to him. He wouldn't want to see anyone hurt - especially by him."  
  
Evelyn nodded. "I think I understand." All this time Evelyn had worried at how things would affect her and Rafe and little Danny, of course. She had never stopped to consider what Danny might be feeling. It was a revelation to her.  
  
Kate looked at her. "Danny understands more than most what it means to be a father, even if there are no blood ties."  
  
Rafe's boots on the steps outside the kitchen startled them both. They quickly tried to wipe away all the traces of tears that their conversation had caused before Rafe walked in, but they weren't quick enough.  
  
"What's going on?" he asked as he entered the kitchen, wiping his boots on the floor mat. He looked from one woman to the other, noticing the reddened eyes and tear streaked cheeks.   
  
Evelyn's watery smile greeted him. "Nothing," she told him, getting up from the table and rinsing the potatos that had been peeled.  
  
He came up behind her, putting his arms around her waist. "What's wrong, Ev?" he asked. "'Nothing' doesn't make your eyes water or turn your nose bright red." He was teasing her, but his stomach was knotted with apprehension.  
  
She turned to look him in the eyes. "We were talking about Danny," she told him.  
  
Rafe stiffened for a moment. "What's he gotten into this time?" he asked, deliberately misunderstanding her. "I told them to stay away from the chicken coop. Luckily, Grace seems to follow orders well. I saw her pull him away when he tried to sneak in."  
  
"She would," Kate interjected. "All her life she's been told to stay away from fences. She's afraid of them."  
  
Evelyn turned to look at Kate, deciding not to put Rafe on the spot for avoiding the topic of his friend. "The camp?" she questioned.  
  
Kate nodded looking at Rafe. If he wouldn't talk about Danny, fine, but that wasn't going to stop her. "She spent her whole life living inside fences that she wasn't allowed outside of. It was dangerous to get to close to them. For the most part the guards let us alone, but they still carried guns and there were a few people shot for trying to get out. Danny was one of few who were allowed outside daily. He worked as a mechanic at a nearby airfield - which was lucky for us because he was able to get extra food."  
  
Rafe had stared at the wall during her little speech, trying not to acknowledge that he was listening, but Kate could tell that he was. So could Evelyn and with a glance they agreed on a plan. They would talk about Danny and Rafe would have to listen.  
  
"It must have been hard living in a camp like that," Evelyn said, her eyes on her husband as he went to rummage through a drawer.  
  
"It wasn't too hard," Kate responded, also watching Rafe. "I was lucky Danny was with me. If it wasn't for him Grace and I would have been living in a dormatory with all the other unattached women. No privacy, bad food. As it was, Danny was able to get us a small cabin and we lived our lives as normally as we could."  
  
"Together?" Evelyn asked.  
  
"As far as eveyone was concerned, Danny and I were married," Kate blushed. "It was easier that way. The guards probably didn't care, but the others in the camp, well, I don't think they would have liked the idea of a married woman living with a single man."  
  
They were silent for awhile, the only sounds in the room coming from Rafe as he continued to rummage through drawers looking for something.  
  
"Does he know?" Evelyn asked.  
  
Unsure, Kate looked over at her. "Does he know what?" she asked, confused.  
  
Evelyn's hand moved to her own stomach. "Does he know that you're pregnant?" she asked.  
  
Kate blushed and Rafe stopped moving. "No, he doesn't," she told them. "I didn't even know until I was halfway back to the States. I thought I was just really seasick." She and Evelyn laughed lightly. "How'd you guess?"  
  
"Well," Evelyn began, glancing over at Rafe who hadn't moved yet, "The green tinge to your skin every morning seemed to be more than motion sickness. And I've seen you rubbing your stomach when you thought no one was around. It just seemed the logical conclusion. When are you due?"  
  
"In March, I think. Danny better be here by then," she declared, "or I'm going to have something to say to him!"  
  
Evelyn laughed. "He'll be here."  
  
Rafe slammed a drawer, causing them to jump. "I'm going to the barn. Call me for dinner."  
  
Kate and Evelyn watched as the porch door slammed shut. "That went well, don't you think?" Evelyn asked.  
  
"Yes," Kate agreed. "It's a start."  
  
  



	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8  
  
The hot days of summer faded into the cool days of fall. Life on the McCawley farm continued. Evelyn and Kate became good friends, united in their effort to get Rafe to talk about Danny. He was still holding everything inside him, but he stopped leaving the room whenever the women started talking about Danny. Kate could tell that he was hanging on every word they said, wanting the information but afraid to ask for it. She and Evelyn hoped that when Danny finally made it home Rafe would be able to talk to him and finally work out all the guilt and other feelings that seemed to be tearing him up inside.  
  
Little Danny, Grace and Ramsey became inseperable. They wandered about the yard, staying near the house, but were usually into some mischief. Rafe was always a willing playmate despite his work so he often had three shawdows following him around throughout the day. Grace was thrilled with her new Uncle Rafe, but she was still waiting for Danny. Evelyn had found on older picture of him, taken before he and Rafe had left for army. Danny looked young and carefree sitting on a hay bale. Evelyn had it framed and it sat next to Grace's bed. Every night she would say her prayers and wish for Dandy to come home.  
  
Evelyn had also framed a picture of Danny for Kate. It had been taken somewhere in Hawaii - he was wearing a t-shirt, sunglasses perched on the top of his head, one of his rare smiles on his face. Kate fell alseep staring at it every night. In the beginning she had felt optimisitc. He would be home soon, she told herself. But as time passed, the fields were harvested, the weather turned colder and her body began to change, she began to lose hope. She so wanted to share these miraculous changes with him. Their child was growing inside her body. Their miracle. With Grace she had been too afraid to enjoy her pregnancy, and now, when she wanted to be rejoicing, she had no one to share it with. She felt more alone than ever.  
  
Evelyn seemed to understand Kate's melancholia, she didn't press the topic of Danny as much as she used to. She made sure that Kate was kept busy with work so that she didn't have too much time to miss him. She didn't know who was more disappointed on Grace's birthday - Grace who spent the whole day waiting for Danny to show up, or Kate, who despite her words of caution to her daughter, was also secretly hoping that it would be the day he came home.   
  
Rafe and Evelyn spared no expense at making Grace's first Christmas a memorable one. They decorated the tree, wrapped presents in bright colored paper and had a delicious christmas dinner. Grace and Danny were captivated by the holiday, but Kate seemed to sink deeper and deeper into despair. She smiled hollowly as Grace pranced around the living room with her new toys. She thanked Rafe and Evelyn for the lovely music box they had given her, but all the light had gone out of her eyes. She needed Danny.  
  
"Rafe," Evelyn whispered in the darkness of their room. "Are you sleeping?"  
  
"No," he whispered back.  
  
"What are we going to do about Kate?" she asked.  
  
He sighed. "I don't know. Maybe when the baby comes...."  
  
Evelyn nestled against his chest, shivering slightly in the winter chill of the room. "I don't know if she'll last that long," she told him. "Ever since Christmas.....even before then, she just hasn't been the same. She's lost hope. She doesn't eat, she only sleeps. If it wasn't for Grace I think she would sleep all the time. It's not healthy, Rafe."  
  
"What do you want me to do about it?" he asked.  
  
"Talk to her," Evelyn told him. "She won't listen to me. Just talk to her."  
  
Rafe sighed again. "I'll try," he promised his wife, kissing her hair. "But I can't make any promises."  
  
Evelyn smiled against his chest. "Thank you Rafe."  
  
  
The next afternoon Evelyn took the kids outside for a walk in the new fallen snow. It was rare enough in Tennessee and she thought they should have some fun while it lasted. Convienently, this left Rafe at home with Kate.  
  
"I'm going to make some tea, do you want some?" he asked her as she sat on living room sofa.  
  
"No thank you," she told him, her eyes on her book, though he knew she wasn't reading it. She hadn't turned a page in the past 15 minutes. This was going to be harder than he thought.   
  
Sitting down next to her, he took the book from her hand and gave her a mug of tea. "I put a little bit of sugar in - don't tell Ev," he told her.  
  
She glanced up at him, not used to being alone with him. "Thanks, but I..."  
  
"Nonsense," he interrupted. "Everyone needs some hot tea on a cold afternoon."  
  
Kate looked at him curiously. "Okay," she said, taking a sip of the hot liquid. "Thanks."  
  
They sat there in silence. Rafe didn't know what to say.   
  
"So, how are you doing?" he finally asked. "Evelyn's worried about you."  
  
Kate shrugged. "I'm fine. There's nothing to worry about."  
  
"Well, I don't know about that. She says you aren't eating and that you'd sleep all day if it wasn't for Grace. Seems to me that isn't normal behavior."  
  
Kate looked away uncomfortably. "The baby's taking a lot out of me, I guess," she replied, her hand resting on her protruding stomach.  
  
"I imagine it does. I can remember the last couple months when Evelyn was pregnant. She slept a lot, but she also ate more than I've ever seen anybody eat."  
  
"I'm not hungry," Kate told him.  
  
Rafe looked at her. He really looked at her. For so many months he had, not so much avoided her, but tried not to think about her, because to do that was to remind him of Danny and all the feelings he evoked. But now he could see that Evelyn was right, she wasn't doing good. She had lost weight, her belly a large bump on her skinny frame. Her hair was limp and lifeless. Her eyes stared at him him from a pale face, the green depths haunted by sorrow.  
  
"You know, Danny's not going to be very happy to see me when he gets back," Rafe said, startling Kate by finally saying his friend's name after so many months. "I mean, he sends you to me to take care of and by the look of you it seems I haven't been doing a very good job of it." Kate continued to stare at him open mouthed. "I imagine Danny's going to be quite surprised to see you. Proud that you're going to have his kid. I hate to see that over shadowed by the fact that, well, that you've given up. The man promised to come back and he will. You have to believe it Kate."  
  
"Do you believe it?" she asked him softly.  
  
Rafe looked at her. "Yes, I believe it," he said. "Man would be fool not come and claim you and Grace and Danny's no fool. You just take care of yourself and his baby. Danny'll come home. He will. Don't give up on him."  
  
Kate watched Rafe leave the room, his words echoing in her mind. 'You have to believe it.' He was right, she had given up on Danny. She had weakened as the days and weeks and then months passed. She had told Grace that it would take Danny a long time to get to them, yet she hadn't heeded her own words. It had only been seven months since she had left China, she couldn't expect Danny to magically show up. He had a lot of obstacles to overcome. Her way home had been smoothed by her father's money, Danny didn't have that luxury.   
  
Kate resolved to wait for him, for as long as it took. If she had to wait until the war was over, then she would. It was only a matter of time now, anyways. The war in Europe was almost over, or so people said, and the Japanese couldn't last much longer. She could wait that long, couldn't she? To get Danny home safely she could wait a long time. Until then she would focus on the baby. She would make sure that when Danny finally returned to her he would also be welcomed by a healthy son or daughter.  
  
  



	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9  
  
"Thanks for the ride, Mr. Fraser," Danny said patting the hood of the old truck.   
  
"Not a problem, boy," the old man replied. "Good to see you home. You tell Rafe and Evelyn hello for me."  
  
Danny smiled. "Will do."  
  
With a cough and a cloud of smoke the truck continued off down the road. Danny turned to face his boyhood home. He had been trying to get here for months and now that he was finally here he thought his heart might burst with the anticipation. The farm hadn't changed at all. The house, the hay shed, the old barn that was actually the plane hangar - it was as if he hadn't left at all. Of course the day he and Rafe had left for the army had been a warm spring day, the fields green and gold with growing corn and wheat. Now they were barren and muddy, but Danny still had the sense that he had stepped back in time. That any minute now Rafe's mom would step onto the front porch and wave to him to come in, or that Rafe's dad would call him into the barn to help fix the plane.  
  
Danny walked up the road leading past the barn to farmhouse, lost in the past, but anticipating his future. Somewhere, either in the house or nearby, his future was waiting for him. Kate and Grace. He felt like running, yelling their names. Eight months.. It had been eight months since he had last seen them and the pain that he had been carrying around inside of him was beginning to fade with the hope of seeing them soon.  
  
A metallic crash and a muttered "sum'bitch," caught his attention as he passed the barn. Danny smiled. Rafe must be working on the plane. While Rafe was a hell of a instinctive pilot, he wasn't much of a mechanic. That had always been Danny's job. Stepping into the gloom of the barn, Danny could see the old crop duster that he and Rafe had learned to fly on. Someone had kept it in pristine condition, it's paint still as red as he remembered.  
  
More muffled curses let him know that Rafe was at the front of the plane, probably digging around in the engine. He stepped quietly around the tail and wing. Rafe's back was to him, his hand running through his hair in frustration, a wrench hanging uselessly from his hand. God, it felt good to see him again. Danny could feel the smile stretching across his face as Rafe hit the plane with his wrench one more time, swearing at it under his breath.  
  
"You know," Danny said, startling Rafe, "Swearing at it never did fix anything. I thought you'd've learned that by now."  
  
Rafe turned slowly to face his friend, his face draining of all color. Dropping the wrench he took a few hesitant steps towards his friend. "Danny?" he whispered.  
  
"Hey, Rafe," Danny replied, his smile faltering. Rafe looked like he was seeing a ghost and that worried Danny. Rafe should have known that he was alive - Kate should have told him. But if he didn't know, then what had happened to Kate? His stomach began to churn. "Say something Rafe," he finally said as the silence stretched on.  
  
Rafe continued to stare at his friend. His mind swirling with all the fear, pain, guilt and rage that he felt. Before either of them knew what happened Rafe curled his hand into a fist and punched Danny, catching him unaware across the cheek.   
  
Danny staggered back, holding a hand to his eye. This was not the welcome he expected.   
  
Rafe's face turned bright red, his fists clenched at his side as he leaned in towards Danny. "Next time you listen to me you little son of a bitch! When I say find another place to land - you do it! No heroics, no fancy maneuvers. You get to safety. You let me worry about myself, you understand me? Do you Danny?" He began to stalk towards Danny, his fists still clenched. Danny backed away warily. "Because I won't live like this again, do you hear?! Don't ever, ever, make my decisions for me! Got that? I make my own decisions and I don't need you interfering and lying to me. God damnit!"   
  
With a sudden movement Rafe leaped at Danny. Danny flinched, unsure of what his friend was going to throw at him next, but Rafe only pulled him into a tight embrace, all the anger seeming to have faded from his body. Danny stood there stunned for a moment, until he realized that Rafe was no longer yelling at him. He was sobbing. Danny felt his own tears begin to fall, hugging him back. He knew exactly how Rafe was feeling. He had lived through it himself.  
  
"Make you a deal," he told Rafe, his voice hoarse, "next time you volunteer for dangerous duty, you give me a chance to volunteer right along with you. No sneaking around and pretending to be assigned." Rafe snorted and Danny felt the tension leave his body. "I wouldn't change a thing I did, Rafe," he told his friend. "Hate me if you want, but I wouldn't change a thing I did back in China."  
  
Rafe pulled away, wipeing his eyes as he looked up Danny, healthy and whole. "I don't hate you Danny," he finally said, "But, Jesus...I can't live like that again. I spent two years feeling guilty. You took the bullets that were meant for me. I started the fight. It was my gun that jammed. I deserved to be the one to die - not you," he explained, his voice thick.   
  
"It was my choice Rafe," Danny told him quietly, his hand on his friend's shoulder. "And I wouldn't change it."  
  
Rafe didn't seem to hear him. "And then I left you behind," Rafe continued. "That's not easy to deal with, Danny. Especially when, I find out that you didn't die. That you weren't dead. You lied to me." He looked over at Danny, his eyes filled with anger again. "Don't ever make my decisions for me," he threatened, his eyes sparking briefly. "These last seven months have been hell. It was bad enough thinking I left your body behind, but to know that you were alive and I...."  
  
Danny could see the pain in his friends face, but his mind caught on what Rafe had said; 'these last seven months..' Rafe had known that he survived. His heart skipped a beat. "Kate's here," he breathlessly interrupted.  
  
Rafe paused, seeing the look on Danny's face. He found his first smile. "Yeah, Kate's here," he told him. "She and Grace showed up in July." He could see that Danny was anxious to get to her. "She's in the house," he offered. Danny turned to go, a grateful smile on his face. "Hey!" Rafe called after him. "Do me a favor - don't startle her, okay?"  
  
Danny turned back to ask a question, but before he could get it out Evelyn walked into the barn.  
  
"Rafe? Are you okay? I thought I heard yelling. Did you finally break the plane?" she joked. Danny turned back to the entrance, seeing Evelyn for the first time.  
  
"Hello Evelyn," he said, causing her to jump.  
  
Her heart pounding, Evelyn squinted, trying to get her eyes to adjust. She could make out two figures standing near the front of the plane. She walked hesitantly around the wing. Rafe's figure was easy for her to recognize, but the other came to her from her memory. Danny. He didn't move as she walked towards him. She stopped a few feet in front of him, staring at him. So many thoughts and emotions were rolling through her. He hadn't changed, was her first thought. He looked exactly as he had when she had last seen him. Slowly she took a step towards him, looking up into his eyes, his wonderful, warm, brown eyes.  
  
"Danny," she whispered as she moved to hug him. His arms enveloped her once again. Evelyn marvelled that even the smell of him hadn't changed. She looked up at him, her eyes wet with tears that hadn't yet fallen. "It's good to have you home," she finally said.  
  
Danny smiled, leaning down to kiss her forehead gently. "It's good to be home."  
  
Evelyn pulled away. "I know there are a couple people up at the house who are dying to see you," she told him. Danny smiled and she had to catch her breath. The love that was in his eyes was obvious to her. He had never looked at her like that. She smiled in return, a weight lifted from her heart to see him so happy. She knew that she had hurt him, but now he had found someone to love. Someone who loved him as he deserved.  
  
"Grace and..." she hesitated, glancing over at Rafe. "Grace is taking a nap," she corrected herself. "And Kate's asleep on the couch in the living room," she told him.  
  
Danny caught the look that passed between his two friends, but decided to let it pass. "Kate's napping?" he asked instead. He had never known her to take naps. She was alwasy too busy. "Is she okay?"  
  
Evelyn smiled. "She's fine. Just don't startle her."  
  
Danny looked at them strangely. "That's what Rafe said," the concern evident in his voice.  
  
Rafe laughed. "Nothings wrong with her. She's just worn out waiting for you," he joked. "Now go see your lady. She's been waiting long enough." Danny smiled at them and turned, jogging towards the house.  
  



	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10  
  
Danny entered the kitchen quietly, not wanting to awaken any of the sleeping occupants in the house. Glancing around the kitchen he noted that not much had changed there either. Stepping softly, he walked into the living room which was just off the kitchen. He paused for a moment, content to just look at Kate's sleeping form. He felt his throat tighten and his heart speed up. She was the most beautiful sight he had seen in a long, long time.   
  
Curled up on her side, her legs drawn up, she slept peacefully, a blanket tucked around her. As was her habit, her hands were cradled under her cheek as if she were praying. She looked as beautiful as an angel, her golden hair pulled back from her face in a pony tail which draped down her back.. Danny's fingers itched to run through it. As if drawn to her by a magnet, he moved across the living room, finally sitting on the coffee table in front of her. Reaching a tentative hand out, he gently stroked her face It was as soft as he remembered.  
  
Mumbling in her sleep, Kate absently brushed at her cheek, as if to brush away a pesky bug. Danny smiled, reaching to stroke her cheek again. This time she swiped her hand across her face, frowning slightly. With an aggravated sigh she rolled towards the back of the couch, almost onto her back, her hand coming to rest on her stomach.  
  
Well, this is progress, Danny thought. He knew that if he could get her onto her back she would eventually wake up. She could never sleep in that position. Watching her, the movement of her hand caught his attention. His breath stopped.  
  
The blanket had shifted when she moved. Her swollen, distended stomach was now in clear view, her hand absently rubbing circles on it. Danny glanced briefly at Kate's face to see if she was awake, but then returned to her big - beautiful - stomach. Hesitantly he reached a hand out to touch it, surprised by it's hardness. He jumped as it shifted beneath his fingers. Tears began to fall down his cheeks as he pressed his hand more fully against Kate's belly, feeling the life pulsing within it.  
  
"It's about time, Flyboy," Kate whispered, smiling gently at him, her hand moving to hold his against her stomach.  
  
Danny looked up at her, a look of wonder on his face. Kate reached out to wipe away his tears. He leaned his face against her hand, closing his eyes in relief. Looking into her eyes he knew that he was finally home. "Got something you want to tell me?" he asked, kissing palm.  
  
"Yes," Kate told him. "It's about time." She smiled, her hand caressing his face once again. "Welcome home, Danny."  
  
Without thought, Danny knelt on the floor beside the couch and burried himself in Kate's arms, his face pressed against her neck. "I missed you so much," he whispered.  
  
Kate held him tightly, afraid to let go. Afraid that it might all be a dream. She had been waiting for this day for years, it seemed. After a moment, Danny pulled back slightly wanting to look at her some more. Her eyes were like pools of the greenest moss, tears falling silently down her cheeks. He tried to wipe them away. "Hey, no crying," he told her. "You're supposed to be happy."  
  
"I am happy," Kate replied. "You have no idea how happy I am."  
  
Danny smiled crookedly at her. "I think I have an idea."  
  
Kate laughed and Danny grinned. It felt so good to be near her again. To hold her in his arms. "God, I missed you," Danny whispered, leaning in to kiss her. The kiss started gently, a reminder of a the feelings they had for each other, but soon those feelings took over as their passion rose. It had been so long since they had been together, and even then they were only just beginning to explore each other. Embers that had been left behind all those months ago in China sparked to life once again.  
  
Pulling away breathlessly, Danny looked down at Kate. "I love you."  
  
"I love you too," she told him, her eyes shining with happiness. "Don't ever leave me alone again."  
  
"I won't," Danny promised. His hand stroking her stomach once again, he smiled crookedly. "Now is there something else you'd like to tell me?" he asked.  
  
Kate beamed up at him. "You were right," she told him. "The rhythm method doesn't work."  
  
Danny laughed. "It's good to home."  
  
"And just in time, too," Kate said. "Three or four more weeks and you would have missed the big event." She rubbed her belly, smiling happily.  
  
"I wouldn't want to miss that," Danny replied, his hand resting on top of hers.   
  
Chapter 10  
  
Kate grabbed onto Danny's arm as she sat up on the couch. Her eyes never leaving his. She felt like she could drown in those eyes. For so long she had dreamed of them, of him. It had been the oddest thing, waking up to see him sitting next to her, his hand on her belly. She had been tensed and waiting for months, but upon finally seeing him she felt only a deep sense of peace. He was home, and in some ways it was like he was never gone. He looked just the same, if not better - more well fed and muscular - than when she had last seen him shirtless and crying outside their cabin in China. She realized that she hadn't really been living her life until now. She felt more alive seeing Danny's love for her in his eyes than she had in months.  
  
A frown creased her brow. Reaching out she touched his cheekbone. "What happened to your face?" she asked.  
  
Danny smiled, flinching slightly at her gentle touch. "I, uh, ran into Rafe working on the plane in the barn."  
  
Kate's eyebrows raised in surprise. "He hit you?!" she asked incredulously.  
  
"Yeah. It wasn't exactly the welcome I expected," Danny said, a grin playing across his face. "God, you're huge." His hands spread across her belly.  
  
Smiling at the awe in his voice, Kate grabbed his hand and moved it to her side. "Feel this," she told him. "Come on little one," she talked to her belly, "show your daddy how strong you are." She laughed as the baby kicked or elbowed Danny's hand.  
  
"Whoa," he looked up at her, his eyes wide with shock. "Does that hurt?"  
  
"Not really," she told him, but then flinched as another movement jabbed her. "Unless he bounces on my bladder or works something underneath my ribs," she admitted.  
  
"He?" Danny asked.  
  
"It's just a feeling," she told him, "but I think it's a boy."  
  
"Well, it's 50-50," Danny said, his hands still on her belly. "But I'll trust you."  
  
"Grace wants a little sister."  
  
"Grace," Danny smiled. "How is she? Does she remember me?"  
  
"Of course she does," Kate told him. "She's been waiting for you. She was really disappointed when you didn't show up on her birthday."  
  
Danny frowned. "I'm sorry," he said. "I was in Peru then, but I was thinking of her. I wanted to be here."  
  
"Hey," Kate said, her hand squeezing his. "It's not your fault. You got here as soon as you could. I know that. We all know that." Danny nodded, his frown lessening. "Peru?" Kate questioned.  
  
"Yeah," Danny replied, letting out a puff of breath. "I've done some traveling."  
  
"I guess," Kate replied.   
  
Their conversation was interrupted by a low growl from the hallway. Both of them turned toward the wary dog.  
  
"Ramsey, stop it," Kate told the lab. The dog stopped growling, it's tail wagging minutely, still eyeing Danny uneasily.  
  
"Ramsey?" Danny questioned, holding out one hand for the dog to sniff.  
  
Kate smiled as Ramsey began fervantly sniffing Danny, licking his hand in welcome. "Yes, it appears that you and Rafe have the same talent for naming. Grace didn't like her Ramsey having the same name as a dog." Kate laughed.  
  
Danny laughed too. "I imagine she didn't."  
  
"She insisted on calling him Ramsey Two for the longest time."  
  
Danny's response died on his lips, his attention caught by the small honey blond child standing in the hall, her green eyes wide as she stared at him. In one hand she held the raggedy looking Ramsey, and in the other she clutched a blanket.  
  
"Hi Gracie," Danny said softly not wanting to startle her. He looked over at Kate, tears stinging his eyes again. "You've gotten big," he told her as she slowly inched her way into the room, her eyes not leaving him. Ramsey padded over to her, waiting to be petted, but she ignored him.  
  
"Come here, sweetheart," Kate called. "Dandy's been waiting to see you."  
  
Crawling up onto the couch, Grace leaned into her mother, still not saying a word. Danny smiled at her, but she only continued to stare, her bottom lip beginning to tremble slightly. Kate hugged her close. "It's okay, Grace. Dandy's back. He's home." Still Grace said nothing.  
  
Danny leaned down, smiling. "Do you remember me, Little One," he asked her. She nodded slowly. "Good," he told her. "I've missed you a lot. I thought of you and your mom all the time." He paused trying to think of a way to reach her. "I was on a big boat for a long time, that's why I wasn't here for your birthday or Christmas. I wanted to be Grace, but I couldn't. But I have lots of new stories to tell you, about the places I've seen and the strange people I've met." It broke his heart to see her staring at him so warily. There had been a time when she would jump into his arms and chatter away with abandon. It didn't seem so long ago to Danny, but to Grace it was half a lifetime. "I'd love to tell you the stories sometime. Would you like that?" he asked. Grace nodded solemnly. Danny smiled. "Good, because I've been saving them up, just for you. But there's a price for my stories - I need a hug," he told her. "Ever since you had to go away, the one thing I missed was the hugs from you. Do you think I can have one now?"  
  
Grace looked up her mother, wanting reassurance. Kate smiled and nodded, her eyes as teary as her daughters. Looking back over at Danny, Grace finally nodded. Danny opened his arms to her and suddenly Grace's little arms were wrapped around his neck. He closed his eyes, the feeling of her little body shaking with her tears causing his own to fall once more. "I missed you Miss Grace," he whispered into her hair. "I missed you so much." He smiled up at Kate, seeing her crying again. "Aren't we a sorry mess," he said, sitting Grace in his lap. "All of us crying - and this is supposed to be a happy day."  
  
Grace leaned against him, once again reaching for the dog tags that were hanging out of his shirt. "Dandy?" she asked in a quiet voice. "Are you going to go away?"  
  
He kissed her head. "No Gracie, I'm not going away," he told her. "I'm home for good. I promise."  
  
She nodded. "Good."  
  
A sniff from behind them let Danny know that they weren't alone. Danny turned to see Rafe and Evelyn standing in the kitchen, watching the family reunion. Evelyn was crying too.  
  
"Well, it's good be home," Danny told everyone, "but I don't know how I feel about everyone crying." They all laughed.   
  
Evelyn moved into the room, sitting in one of the empty chairs. "We've been waiting a long time and it's just kind of shocking," she told him. She looked at him curiously. "What happened to your eye."  
  
Danny grinned over at Rafe, who was looking at the ground, embarrassed.  
  
"I, uh," Rafe said, clearing his throat, "I hit him," he admitted.  
  
Evelyn gasped at her husband. "You hit him! Rafe, how could you..." Danny's laughter cut her off. Kate began to giggle and soon Rafe joined in. Evelyn stared at them all as if they were crazy. "I can't believe you would hit him after all that this time. He's your best friend."  
  
"It's okay, Evelyn," Danny said. "I probably deserved it."  
  
"I doubt that," she responded, still eyeing Rafe.  
  
"I'm sorry, alright?" Rafe said. "I didn't mean to hit him, it just happened." He shrugged. "He did deserve it too." Rafe smiled over at Danny.  
  
Grace, not really interested in the adult's conversation, looked around the room. She was the first to see the small figure watching them. "Danny!" she called to him. "Dandy's home. I tol' you he'd come home!"  
  
Danny glanced curiously down at Grace in his lap, wondering why she was talking to him like that. Everyone else in the room fell silent, staring at the little boy standing in the hall. Ramsey's happy bark drew Danny's attention and he froze, staring at the little boy who stared back at him solemnly. Everyone's eyes followed the little boy as he walked across the room to stand near Rafe, looking up at him expectantly.   
  
"Hey buddy," Rafe said, hoisting him into his arms. No one seemed to know what to say as they divided their stares between Danny and the little boy in Rafe's arms. All the attention causing him to duck his head and hide.  
  
Danny didn't know what to say or what to think as he stared at his son. The child that he knew existed but knew nothing about. At least now he knew his name. He felt he had to say something to ease the awkwardness. He could see the tension on Rafe's face. Glancing over at Evelyn, he saw that she looked scared and worried, her face pale. Whatever he said right now would set the tone for the rest of their lives.  
  
Clearing his throat he looked down at Grace. "So, who is this Gracie?" he asked quietly.  
  
"He's Danny," she told him matter of factly. "He's my friend."  
  
Danny looked up at the little boy, seeing both himself and Evelyn in his little face. "Hello Danny," he said.  
  
"Hi," the little boy replied quietly after Rafe gave him a little squeeze.   
  
"It's nice to meet you. I'm Grace's daddy," he said, firmly drawing the lines.  
  
"You can call him Uncle Danny, just like I call Uncle Rafe," Grace chimed in, her natural exhuberance returning. "Can we go play? Can we have a cookie?" She looked expectantly at her mother and Evelyn. "Can we?"  
  
"I think that would be fine," Kate replied. "Only one cookie each and you have to wear your boots and jackets."  
  
"Okay," she jumped down from Danny's lap. "Come on Danny," she called. Halfway across the room, she turned back. "Dandy?" she asked. "Will you stay?"  
  
Danny smiled. "I'm not going anywhere," he told her. "Have fun."  
  
"We will," she said, running into the kitchen. "Come on, Danny!" she called back. Scrambling down from Rafe, her little friend followed her into the kitchen and out to the porch.  
  
"Rafe would you..." Evelyn asked, pointing towards the retreating children.  
  
"Yeah," he said, turning to follow them. "You better be putting your boots and jackets on or I'm eating your cookies," he called to them. They giggled in return, obviously not taking his threat seriously.  
  
Once again the room was silent. Danny moved to sit on the couch next to Kate. She took his hand, giving him what support she could. He smiled at her weakly before looking over at Evelyn.  
  
"He's a good looking boy," he told her, his voice hoarse.  
  
Evelyn nodded, trying to control the tears that were threatening to fall. "Yes," she replied. She glanced around the room, a panicked look on her face. "I should probably see to dinner," she finally said after a moment, hurriedly getting up.   
  
"I'll do it," Kate interjected, wanting to give them some time to talk.  
  
Evelyn shook her head. "No, I'll do it. You two need some time."  
  
They watched as she quickly went into the kitchen, keeping her back to them. "I think I'm going to go talk to Rafe," Danny told Kate softly. He leaned over and kissed her. "Will you be okay?"  
  
Kate smiled. "I'll be fine....now that you're home," she told him. "Go talk to Rafe."  
  
He got up and walked into the kitchen. Pausing briefly behind Evelyn he tried to think of something to say to her, but by the slope of her shoulders he knew that she wasn't ready to talk yet. Continuing past her he grabbed his coat and went outside.  
  
  



	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11  
  
Levering herself off the couch, Kate walked into the kitchen, her hands supporting her lower back. The baby seemed to have doubled in size in the past few weeks and his large size was hard for her small frame to bear.  
  
"How are you doing, Ev," she asked her friend as she leaned against the counter next to her.  
  
"I'm fine," she said, staring out the window, not looking at Kate.  
  
"Really?" Kate asked disbelieveingly.  
  
Evelyn turned to face her, trying to smile through her tears. "No, not really," she admitted. She moved to sit at the table. Kate gratefully followed, sinking into the chair with a sigh of relief. "You look like you're going to explode," Evelyn told her.  
  
Kate rubbed her belly. "It's feels like it sometimes," she laughed. She watched Evelyn closely. "Talk to me Ev. How are you doing? Why didn't you want to talk to Danny?"  
  
With a sigh, Evelyn slumped back in her chair. "I don't know what to say to him," she finally said. "I'm so glad that he's home. I've prayed for this day for...years. But it's....."  
  
"Complicated?" Kate suggested.  
  
"Yes, complicated," Evelyn agreed. "Is he doing the right thing? Are we doing the right thing - by not telling Danny who his real father is now? Is that fair to anyone? To Danny? To Rafe? I don't know." She looked over at Kate, hoping to see answers to her questions.  
  
"I don't know Ev, I just don't know."  
  
They sat in silence for awhile, each lost in her own thoughts.  
  
"I think you and Danny need to talk," Kate finally said. "I think there are things you need to tell each other." Evelyn nodded.  
  
"Let me just get dinner started and give Rafe and Danny some time. Then I'll go find him."   
  
"Sounds good," Kate replied, relieved that things would be settled soon.  
  
  
Danny stepped off the porch, looking around for Rafe. The kids were playing in a little shed off to the side of the house, their happy chatter bringing a smile to his face as he looked around the yard. It took a moment before he saw Rafe down by the barn. He walked silently towards his friend, his hands stuffed into his pockets to keep warm.  
  
"You know, I used to come down here and talk to you," Rafe told him as he approached, not even bothering to look at his friend.  
  
Danny looked around Rafe's shoulder, seeing his tombstone. A strange feeling coursed down his spine. "It's nice. Real nice," he offered lamely, not knowing what else to say.  
  
"Yeah, well, I had someone else write it," Rafe told him, a lopsided smile flittering across his face. "I'd come down here and talk about Danny - Little Danny," he continued. "How he was almost 7 pounds when he was born. How it took 30 hours for him to finally be born. How he kept us up night for the first two weeks of his life." He paused, drawing in a shuddering breath. "His first word was Daddy and I was so proud," Rafe told him, his voice low. "He's a great kid. Smart. Quiet. Thoughtful. But he has this mischevious side too." He turned to finally look briefly at Danny. "He's a lot like you."   
  
Danny nodded uncomfortably. He could see the pain on Rafe's face.   
  
Rafe turned around again, looking at the tombstone. "Sometimes I can see a bit of Evelyn in him, but mostly it's you."   
  
They were silent as they listened to Ramsey's barking and Danny and Grace's laughter. "Mostly I came down here just to say thank you," Rafe finally said. "Thank you for saving my life. And thank you for giving me.......a son like Danny." Rafe quickly wiped away the tear that ran down his face. "Because I don't deserve him. I know that. Not after the way I treated you when I came back, not after....."  
  
"Stop Rafe," Danny said, not able to hear anymore. "Just stop." He ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "I don't know what to tell you Rafe," Danny told him. "I've had a chance to think about this for a long time - over three years - and I still don't know what to say. I'm sorry, okay? It doesn't seem like enough, but I am sorry."  
  
Rafe turned to face his friend. "What do you have to be sorry for?" he asked. "I'm the one..."  
  
"Do you think you are the only who can feel guilt?" Danny interrupt, a wry smile on his face.  
  
"Well, no," Rafe replied, "But I still don't see what you..."  
  
"Evelyn," Danny interrupted again. "I'm sorry for what happened with Evelyn. For how I let that come between us. I never meant for that to happen."  
  
Rafe shook his head. "That's not an issue. I can understand that now. You thought I was dead. It was unrealistic for me to think she wouldn't get on with her life."  
  
"Yeah, but I was your best friend," Danny told him.  
  
"You still are my best friend," Rafe told him. "At first I was hurt and I lashed out at you, but..."  
  
"She loved you," Danny said, interrupting him again.  
  
"Yeah, well, she loved you too," Rafe told him.  
  
"But not the way she loved you," Danny told him. "And I knew that, maybe I wouldn't let myself admit it, but I knew it. The only reason she had to stay with me was because of ...Danny. She told you, but she didn't tell me."  
  
"She didn't want you to be distracted," Rafe told him.  
  
Danny smiled. "Maybe."  
  
"Are you telling me you didn't love Evelyn," Rafe asked.  
  
"No," Danny shook his head. "I loved Evelyn. I still love her, but not like that. I'm just saying that we shouldn't have gotten together like we did. We were both missing you and then when you came back and were so mad and self righteous, well, I guess I just got mad too. You'd left me too, when you went to the Eagle Squadron. You didn't even give me a chance to go with you. That hurt. And then you come back and got so mad at me and.....Things shouldn't have gone as far as they did. I should have bowed out, let you and Evelyn get on with your lives, but...I didn't and things got.....complicated."  
  
"Complicated," Rafe laughed softly. "That's a word for it."  
  
"But Evelyn and Danny, they don't have anything to do with China," Danny told him. "You're my best friend Rafe. The only family I had. There was no way I was going to leave you for the Japs. And getting shot, well, I didn't even think. I just reacted." He looked at Rafe seriously. "Can you honestly tell me, that if our situations had been reversed - if they were about to shoot me and you had a chance to stop it - that you wouldn't have acted the same way? That you wouldn't have done whatever it took to get me out of China and back to safety?"   
  
Nodding slowly, Rafe agreed. "Yeah, I would have done the same thing."  
  
"You were always protecting me," Danny said. "This time it was my turn. And I wouldn't change a thing, because if I hadn't've gotten shot I never would have met Kate and that's not a possiblity I want to live with."  
  
"She's a good gal," Rafe told his friend.  
  
"Yeah," Danny agreed. "She is."  
  
They watched the kids stomp up the porch steps and into the kitchen, Ramsey hot on their heels.  
  
"About Danny," Danny began, glancing over at Rafe.   
  
"Evelyn and I had always planned to tell him who is real father was, when he was old enough to understand," Rafe told him, not waiting to hear what Danny had to say. "It's one of the reason we named him what we did - Daniel Walker McCawley. We thought he deserved to know about his father and well, it seemed like the right thing to do. To name him after his father." He shrugged.  
  
"I appreciate that," Danny told him. "I do. I'm sure when he gets older he'll probably have questions, but you're his father, Rafe. I love him. I'd give up my life to keep him safe, but you are his father. You were there when he was born, you were there when he cried as baby. You are the one he calls daddy. I can't replace that."  
  
"I wasn't around much," Rafe told him. "I only had six weeks of leave for two years. I only came home permanently in May."  
  
"That doesn't matter, Rafe," Danny said. "To that little boy you are daddy. We don't need to confuse him. I can be Uncle Danny and if and when he starts asking questions, then we can deal with it."  
  
"Are you sure?" Rafe asked, a weight seeming to life from his shoulders. He had planned to do the noble thing and let Danny claim his son, but it hurt to think of little Danny calling someone else 'daddy.'  
  
"Yes, I'm sure. I wouldn't want any other man raising my son," Danny told him, his throat tight. He glanced over at Rafe, seeing his concen. "Don't worry about me," Danny smiled. "I've had plenty of time to think about this. It all comes down to Grace."  
  
"Grace?" Rafe looked at him confusedly.  
  
"Yes, Grace," Danny told him. "Grace's father was a real bastard. He left them in China. He didn't care and that was fine by me. I'm the only father Grace has ever known and I tried to think how I would feel if Micheal strolled back into her life and, well, took over for me. If Grace started calling him daddy instead of me." Danny paused, collecting his thoughts. "I don't want to do that to you, Rafe. It wouldn't be fair to you or Danny or Evelyn. You are a family. I'll be a part of that family, me and Kate and Grace, but he is your son in all the ways that matter, just as Grace is mine."  
  
Rafe thought for a minute. "It's good to have you home, Danny. I missed you," he told his friend, willing to accept his decisions and move on.  
  
"I missed you too, Rafe." Danny smiled over at Rafe, knowing that they would never need to discuss this topic again. "You know this tombstone is really nice," Danny joked, "but it gives me the creeps. Do you think we could move it?"  
  
Rafe laughed, the tension that had been in the air suddenly disapated. "Do you know how heavy that sucker is? That's pure granite!"  
  
"Think any one wants to buy a slightly used tombstone?" Danny asked, with a grin.  
  
"We could probably sell it to Bill Fraser - he's always looking for a good deal. We'd probably have to take it over to him, though."  
  
"Are you suggesting I dig up my own tombstone?" Danny smiled.  
  
Rafe grinned back at him. "Well, it's only fair - I put the damn thing in," he declared.  
  
Both men laughed, the weight of years of guilt and apprehension lifted off their shoulders. They were nothing more than two friends finally returned to the childhood home, joking around like always.  
  
"I see you two are doing well," Evelyn said behind them. "Not hitting each other anymore." They turned and smiled at her. She couldn't help smiling back despite her worries. This was a side of them she had never seen before, their friendship and love shining in their eyes. They were once again whole.  
  
"Rafe was just suggesting that I should help dig up my own tombstone," Danny told her, grinning. "I just don't think it's fair."  
  
"I put it in," Rafe defended. "Besides, you didn't mind moving old man McLeod's tombstones around!"  
  
"Well, sure, but he paid me!" Danny winked at Evelyn. She laughed.  
  
"Rafe," Evelyn asked as their laughter died down, "Could you go help Kate watch the kids. I'd like to talk to Danny."  
  
"Sure," Rafe replied, kissing her cheek and moving towards the house. "See you in a few minutes?"  
  
"A few minutes," she agreed.  
  
They watched Rafe walk into the house, a smile still on Danny's face. Evelyn watched him, glancing away when he caught her staring.  
  
"So," she began awkwardly.  
  
"So."  
  
"You two seem to have worked some things out," she said, not knowing how to start.  
  
"Yeah," Danny agreed.  
  
"I haven't seen Rafe laugh like that in a long time. It's good to see you two smiling."  
  
Danny ducked his head shyly. "Well, we cleared the air a bit. Talked about some things that were way over due. Settled some stuff."  
  
"That's good."  
  
"Yeah, it is."  
  
They paused again.  
  
"Look, Danny..."  
  
"Evelyn, I...."  
  
They stopped, smiling at each other.  
  
"Go ahead," Evelyn told him.  
  
Danny took a deep breath and let it out. "I don't really know what to say," he told her. "What happened between us....well, I don't think it should have happened. We were both missing Rafe and were alone, and well, I guess it was a mistake. I knew you still loved Rafe and I shouldn't have pushed..." he trailed off, looking away awkwardly.  
  
"You didn't push, Danny," Evelyn told him, her hand coming to rest on his arm. "I was a willing participant. I knew what I as doing and for that I'm sorry." She blushed. "I knew I was still in love with Rafe, but I let myself.. I ...used you to replace him, in away. That was wrong of me, and I know that and I'm sorry. But I can't say that it was a mistake," she told him, her grip tightening on his arm as her eyes filled with tears. "Because to say that would be saying that Danny, my...our..son was a mistake. And he's not; he's a miracle." She took a deep breath. "Thank you for giving him to me," she whispered.  
  
Danny reached out and pulled her into his arms, her tears once again wetting his chest. "He is a miracle," Danny agreed softly. "But you don't have to be sorry. I think we were both guilty of the same thing - missing Rafe."  
  
Evelyn nodded. "I did love you, Danny. I do."  
  
"I know you did," he reassured her. "And I loved you. I do love you. But not the way I love Kate or you love Rafe."  
  
"Yes," Evelyn agreed.  
  
"Are we okay?" Danny asked after awhile, leaning down to look in her eyes.  
  
Evelyn smiled up at him. "I think so."  
  
Danny smiled back at her, kissing her forehead. "Good. Let's go inside. I'm hungry."   
  
Evelyn laughed lightly as they walked back to the house arm and arm.  
  
  



	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12  
  
Danny entered his room quietly. Actually, it was his room no longer; it was their room, he corrected himself.   
  
The room had been his from the age of 13 until he and Rafe had left for the army when he was 20. It hadn't been made into a guest room or sewing room in his absence- it was the same as he had left it, just waiting for him to come home. He had never felt like a guest in the McCawley house. From the day he moved in after his father had shot himself, Danny had been treated as another member of the family. Another son. And his room had been perserved as such - just like Rafe's old room. It was a shrine to his teenage years. His old books and magazines still lined the shelves, the photo's of his friends, girlfriends and favorite baseball players still adorned the walls, and his old baseball mit still rested just where he had always left it - on the dresser.   
  
The only difference now was that he could detect a decidedly feminine presence. Kate had bee living in the room for the past 7 months and her touches could easily be seen among his old things; a pretty embroidered pillow, some hair bands and brushes on the dresser, a straw hat perched on his baseball bat. The room was definitly theirs now.  
  
Danny smiled. How many nights had he slept in this very bed dreaming about girls and his future? Too many to count, he knew, but now he had the girl of his dreams in his bed waiting for him. That was something his younger self would never have believed.  
  
Pulling back the covers, he slowly slid into bed, spooning up to Kate. She instinctively snuggled back against him, her backside rubbing against him provocatively. This bed was the same size as the bed they had shared in China, but Danny had to wonder how they would manage to sleep in it now. Kate was a lot bigger. He placed a hand on her belly, still awed by the life moving inside her.  
  
"Did they finally fall asleep?" Kate asked sleepily.  
  
"Yeah," Danny replied, kissing her shoulder. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."  
  
Placing a hand over his, Kate yawned. "You didn't. I've been dozing off and on waiting for you to finish up your story."  
  
"And one more. And one more. And just one more..." Danny grinned. "They were insatiable."  
  
"Well, Grace missed you," Kate told him. "She talked about you all the time. I think she piqued Danny's curiousity a bit."  
  
They were quiet for a bit, both thinking over Kate's words.  
  
"He's a wonderful little boy," Danny finally said, a slight catch in his voice.  
  
"Yes he is," Kate agreed, her hand rubbing his arm comfortingly. "He's smart, confident, curious, caring....he's your son," she told him softly. "Rafe and Evelyn have raised him well."  
  
Danny pressed his forehead between Kate's shoulderblades, his breathing becoming labored. Kate's heart ached for the pain she knew he was feeling.  
  
"Did I do the right thing?" he asked imploringly, sounding like a lost little boy.  
  
Kate brought his hand up to her face and kissed it tenderly, craddling it against her cheek. "How do you feel about it?"  
  
Danny sniffed. "It hurts," he admitted. "But I think it would hurt worse to know that I was hurting Rafe - again. I don't want to confuse Danny, either. Rafe's the only father he's ever known and for me to step in and tear apart their family like that....I just can't do it." His voice hitched with a small sob. "I've interferred enough in Rafe's life. I can't take Danny away from him."  
  
"You love him," Kate told him reassuringly. "You love them both."  
  
Danny nodded against her back. "I do, and I don't want to hurt them anymore. I won't. But I don't want Danny to think that I don't care...that I don't love him. I don't want him to think that he was a mistake."  
  
"He won't, Danny," Kate said, the conviction in her voice giving Danny a little comfort. "When he's old enough he'll have questions, but you - you and Rafe and Evelyn - can explain it to him. He is loved. He has always been loved. Maybe he will only know you as Uncle Danny, but that won't change what you feel for him. He'll understand that eventually." Squeezing his hand, she kissed it again, wanting him to feel her love. "You made the right decision."  
  
Saying nothing in response, Danny kept his face pressed against her back, his tears wetting her nightgown. Slowly his tears stopped.  
  
With a shuddering breath Danny pulled away from her, pulling her onto her back and then helping her turn to face him. He simply looked at her for a moment.  
  
"I missed you," he finally said as they lay face to face, her belly pressing between them.   
"I really missed you." He reached up to stroke her face, his eyes tracing over her features lovingly. "I didn't realize just how much until I saw you sleeping on the couch. You are my life, Kate," he told her. "My soul." He smiled slightly as he wiped away the tears that were beginning to fall from her eyes. "When you left I felt so empty - like my heart had been taken away." He reached into the bodice of her nightgown, pulling out the chain that she always wore. Attached to it was his pilot's ring; the ring that he had pressed into her hand as a promise all those months ago.  
  
He looked up into her luminous eyes, bright with tears. "I told you that I would marry you and now that you are a free woman I'm asking." He smiled at her, his brown eyes glowing with love. "Will you marry me, Kate?"  
  
A tear ran down her cheek. "Yes," she whispered, lifting her face to his.  
  
They kissed tenderly, holding their passion in check, but letting their love flow freely. Reaching up to caress his bruised cheek, Kate pulled away. "I love you," she whispered.  
  
Kissing her nose, Danny grinned. "I love you too."  
  
He moved to pull her closer, but was unable to. Her belly was in the way. They both laughed softly. Danny reached down to caress their child who replied with a vigorous kick.  
  
"As much as I'd like to marry you before this one is born," he said, patting her belly, "I don't think it's going to be possible. According to just about everyone I was killed in action. Somehow I have to figure out how to resurrect myself and then we can get married." He frowned. "I don't think it's going to be very easy. It might take a long time."  
  
"It's okay," Kate told him. "It doesn't matter to me."  
  
Danny looked at her with soulful eyes. "Well, it kinda matters to me."  
  
Kate caressed his face again, a small smile on her face. "In my heart I was married to you a long time ago. That's enough for me."  
  
Danny kissed her again, amazed at the depth of the love he felt for her.  
  
Pulling away, a frown creased his brow again. "Are you sure you want to marry a guy like me?" he asked. "I know your family has a lot of money. Right now I don't have a penny to my name. Everything that was mine - the farm and my father's house - belongs to Rafe now, since technically I'm dead. And honestly, I don't know if I want it back." He paused thoughtfully. "Well, maybe the house, but I don't think I want to be a farmer. I've kind of been thinking that I want to go to college, maybe become a teacher and do some writing. I don't know how I'm going to go to college and support you and Grace and this one," he rubbed her stomach. "I know Rafe would help us out - let me work on the farm with him, but I don't want to live off Rafe. It won't be easy for us - at least for a couple of years, not as bad as China, but not as good as I had hoped......"  
  
Kate listened as he rambled on about his plans and insecurities about their future. She could hear his boyish enthusiasm warring with the more adult worry of providing for his family as he thought they deserved. Obviously he had lots of time to think about this. Finally, though, she took pity on him and stopped his monologue by placing a finger against his lips.  
  
"Money is not a problem," she told him. "I don't care if we live like we did in China, as long as we're together."  
  
"Well, yeah," Danny agreed, looking down at her, "But I want better than that. I want to be able to support our family and that's going to be difficult until I'm officially alive again, and even then it'll be a few years....."  
  
Kate placed her finger against his lips again. "Money is not a problem," she repeated.  
  
"But..." Danny tried to protest, but Kate wouldn't let him.  
  
"You were right," she told him. "My family has money. A lot of money. So does Micheal's family." Danny frowned. "As his widow I'm entitled to his assets. His mother is trying to fight it, but my father is seeing that most of it comes to me."  
  
Danny's frown deepened. "I don't......"  
  
"I don't want his money, either," Kate said, knowing what Danny was going to say. "But I won't turn it away - for Grace's sake. I've told my father to put it into a trust fund for Grace and any other children we have. Micheal's money will be theirs. As for you not being able to support us...." Kate paused. She didn't know how Danny was going to respond to her bit of news. She new some men didn't like the idea of their wife being able to provide for the family better than he could. "When I turn 25 in May I will gain access to my trust fund. It's my money - set aside a long time ago by my grandparents and my father. When we marry it will be our money."  
  
Danny swallowed nervously. "How much?" he asked softly. When she told him his eyes bulged. Kate had to bite her lip to keep herself from laughing at his obvious distress. "Kate, I...I can't... it's..." he was at a loss for words.  
  
"It's my money," she told him. "It will be ours. We don't have to have the kind of lifestyle that that kind of money can provide. But we can live comfortably." Danny laughed uncomfortably at her understatement. "We can do whatever we want," she emphasized. "You can go to college and then you can get a job teaching. We can fix up your old house and live there, near Rafe and Evelyn. You can teach or write or both, it doesn't matter to me - as long as we're together."  
  
Still partially in shock, Danny looked down at her, seeing her earnestness. "So what are you going to do? Eat chocolates all day?"  
  
Kate smiled. "I am going to be a wife and a mother and I'm going to raise our half dozen kids. I don't need extravagance. I just need you." She looked up at him expectantly, hoping he realized what a gift this money could be.  
  
Letting out a puff of air, he offered her a wobbly smile. "Okay, sounds good to me," he finally said. "We'll have to talk about it some more, but I'm not stupid enough to say no." Leaning down he kissed her once again.  
  
  
  
Kate woke up slowly, the morning light just beginning to filter in through the window. The pressure on her bladder was getting pretty painful, but she didn't want to get up just yet.  
  
At some point in the night she had moved from their original spooning position so that she was now facing Danny. He looked so peaceful and handsome as he slept, her heart tightened as her eyes began to well up. He was actually home, she reminded herself. She hadn't dreamed it all.  
  
Looking at him laying there she could see some of the changes their time apart had wrought. He had filled out across the chest and shoulders, as if he had been doing heavy lifting and the scars on his chest had faded to an even lighter shade of pink. But his face was still the same; incredibly handsome and yet boyish at the same time. Her own Adonis.  
  
Grace's small snore drew Kate's attention. She smiled as she saw her daughter once again craddled lovingly in Danny's arms. 'My two angels,' she thought. 'My heart and soul.' Kate closed her eyes, feeling her emotions welling up uncontrollably. Since Danny's arrival yesterday she had focused on everyone's feelings but her own. Danny, Rafe, and Evelyn had settled their long standing issues. And Danny had decided on his roll in little Danny's life. Kate was glad these worries had been put to rest so soon, because now she and Danny could move on with their life together.   
  
A wave of love and relief coursed through her body as she watched Danny and Grace sleeping peacefully. A small sob escaped her lips. She couldn't stop her tears from silently falling. Her dream had finally come true, she realized. The man she loved had held her tenderly in his arms all night long, and now, in the early hours of the morning their children lay in bed between them - one cradled in his arms, the other cradled in her womb.  
  
Danny's eyes opened slowly. He smiled softly, seeing her tear streaked face, his love for her evident in the depths of his warm brown eyes. He reached a hand out to carress her cheek, wiping away her tears. Kate nuzzled his hand, feeling so profoundly happy that she thought her heart might burst.  
  
"I love you," he said softly, so as not to wake Grace.  
  
"I love you too," she whispered. And she meant it with her whole heart.  
  
End Smiling Back III  
  
SBIV is a work in progress at the moment. I will post when I have more.  
  
  



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